Those terrible games...

[Nerd_Annhilator]

Catwoman

 

Wrong, just.....wrong.....

 

 

--Y-you PLAYED THAT?!

 

Aiee.

[tags]

hmm...

 

 

 

ghostbusters for atari

 

just plain ol StUnK!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

WAY worse than my upper lip...

[narfblat]

I agree with the people who dislike TPM. I wasn't able to get past Otoh Gunga.

[Darth Groovy]

Ghost Recon (pc, ps2, xbox, gamecube, xbox)

 

The year this thing came out, every gameing magazine hyped this thing up worse than the Star Wars prequals. The big thing was graphics, and realism.

 

What I got was a game that is just so difficult to play that it is virtually unplayable. Clearly, this game was made for the pc minded mature shooters, but also ushered in another classification of games that I just hate, Enter the "tactical shooter".

 

We already knew that Ghost Recon was not designed to be "run and gun" type shooter, but here is a short explanation of what playing Ghost Recon is like. First of all, you have this rediculous interface, in which you tell your sqaud what to do and where to go....sounds like fun, but it requires so much consentration and patience to execute, that the fun is over by the time you figure out what to do next. You spend most of your time fighting the freaking interface, rather than fighting any real terrorist threat. The excitement is minimal, probably less excitement than you would find on a paintball survival ranch....only that is easier, because you don't have to fight the interface. Then there is the multiplayer. Most of the time, you are going to spend sitting on a hill looking through a sniper scope, waiting for something exciting to happen. If you have as little patience as me, leave this game alone.

 

Score: 29% (for graphics only)

 

Rainbow Six 3 (xbox)

 

Now THIS one had a far more interesting story, and a better interface, but the gameplay still sucks. About the most excitement I get out of this, is tossing a flash grenade into a room full of people, it's objectives are so specific to the point of just plain annoying. By the time you figure out where you are on the map, half your sqaud is dead, and most of your objectives have failed. Multiplayer is more fast paced than Ghost Recon, but here is the kicker....attention to detail. Sure in real life, you do get but one life to live, but where is the fun in that, in a multiplayer video game scenario? Some brat caps you in the back of the head, and you have to wait until the entire game is over....absoulutely no re-spawn. And if you have a bad connection issue or lag....it sucks even worse. I got a deal on this game, played it for a week...trying to convince myself that it was cool, but failed to see any satisfaction what so ever. I guess I just hate tactical shooters period.

 

The only game that remotely passes as a tactical shooter that I enjoy, is Republic Commando....only because it is easy to pick up on....and they made it fun to play.

 

Score: 35% (only for not being like Ghost Recon....meh...)

[Sabretooth]

A lot...

Here's one:

Lord of the Rings - Fellowship of the Ring. Luckily i borrowed this game. NOT worth buying at all.

[TiE23]

Spider Man 2, you play it at GameStop for 10 minutes, swinging around is so cool, but when you get it, 2 days later, its really, really, really boring....

 

TiE

[toms]

I liked spiderman 2 - though they did drag it out by making you do far woo many random crimes.

 

Although i can find things to pick apart in most games, when i think about it I've actually played very few terrible games. Most had enough redeeming features to make it worth playing. Some were incredibly frustrating (but you still wanted to play), some (like Halo single player, Doom 3, Jedi Outcast) were very disappointing... but usually still passable.

 

TPM on PC was so bad i only played 3 levels then took it back.

 

Xwing vs Tie Fighter is probably the only other game i've ever taken back. It wasn't a bad game (in hindsight) but when everyone was expecting a Tie Fighter style single player game and they delivered a buggy (out of the box) mulitplayer game (before anyone had internet) with almost no single player content it was bound to annoy people. If i could have multiplayed it i'd probably have loved it.

 

Echelon - Wind Warriors: This was a planet-based sci-fi flight sim with interesting looking flight models and graphics... but it's UI was incomprehensible, the mission briefings were 10 pages of unreadble-font, bad english rubbish... Not sure i ever got past the training level.

 

PS/ Groovy (re: 1st post) - did you ever try Contra - Shattered Soldier on PS2?

Not great (infact i thought this was the game you were talkig about at first) but if you can find someone to multiplay with it can be some fun (very hard) side-scrolling action.

[Astrotoy7]

Ehhh, Never Winter Nights... First it was awesome, neat world. But when you always ran into uber-high level bitches who were the last enemy in your way, it made me sad. And how you could only have one "henchman", ghey.

 

How dare you! *draws long sword+3*

 

its not so bad Tie, one henchman, one animal companion(panther=awesome), and 2-3 summon creatures...(eg, sprites, boar, spider etc - some of which you can posess!) when you come across "bosses" send in these suckas first, to weaken, then you move in and finish off....s'easy

 

methinks you need to reinstall and play it properly, because NWN=freakin awesome

 

mtfbwya

[edlib]

XIII (for Gamecube.)

The game is actually very well done, and by all appearances, very interesting.

The control scheme on the other hand... So terrible that I have yet to get off the first level after hours of playing, and have pretty much abandoned this one totally.

 

Myst. (PC)

Unless you just love puzzles for puzzles sake, this one is a snooze-fest. I so didn't care about the the thin excuse of a story, (with some terrible, terrible acting thrown in for good measure.) I can't believe they have made as many sequels as they have.

 

The Temple Of Elemental Evil. (PC)

I liked this game, but it was buggier than betaware. Plus, it really took forever to get anywhere. I thought it would bring me back to my old days of 'graph-paper and d20 nerdlyness'... but all it really did was frustrate me. I stuck with it for a really long time though.

 

Tomb Raider: Angel of Darkness (PC)

More bad controls, now with impossible camera angles. Glad I didn't pay for this one (came bundled in with a soundcard or something.) People tell me that this is the worst of the series. Having never played any of the others I sure hope that's right. Otherwise I can't begin to fathom how the series became so popular.

 

Rainbow Six 3 (PC)

Same as previous comments someone made above. This one came bundled too.

 

Star Wars: Bounty Hunter (GC)

I just got too frustrated with this one. The levels were huge, had to be completed in a very specific order, and there was no way to save in-level progress, so if you are inches from the end, and lose your last life, it was all the way back to the very beginning to do it ALL over again. No thanks.

 

Star Wars: Battle For Naboo (PC)

Just badly done. Totally uninspiring.

 

Luigi's Mansion (GC)

Might have been entertaining for littler kids... but once you came to the realization that every level was going to be EXACTLY THE SAME, it lost it's charm.

[Prime]

Galaxies.

[Samuel Dravis]

A lot...

Here's one:

Lord of the Rings - Fellowship of the Ring. Luckily i borrowed this game. NOT worth buying at all.

Yeah, that one was terrible...

[Pie™]

Otherwise I can't begin to fathom how the series became so popular.

 

'Nuff said.

[edlib]

Yeah... but pixelated boobage will only get you so far if the gameplay and the controls totally suck.

There had to be a little more going on with those games than... those.

 

Or am I just totally underestimating the deperate horny loneliness of the average teen male gamer?

[lukeskywalker1]

Next Gen Lara Croft:

 

 

But I have to agree, I don't like the series, nor the movie(s)? The first one sucked so bad I .... yeah, I just have nothing to say about it. I think I played tomb raider 3 at a friends house... just not my thing, lol.

[toms]

XIII (for Gamecube.)

The game is actually very well done, and by all appearances, very interesting.

The control scheme on the other hand... So terrible that I have yet to get off the first level after hours of playing, and have pretty much abandoned this one totally.

 

I just finished this last week on XBOX and it was fairly enjoyable. Not an altime classic but ok. What did they do to the GCN version to make the controls so hard? The XBOX ones were standard console FPS.

 

Tomb Raider: Angel of Darkness (PC)

More bad controls, now with impossible camera angles. ... Otherwise I can't begin to fathom how the series became so popular.

 

Its not that its dramatically worse... its just that the series never moved on at all from the first game. At the time Tomb Raider was pretty amazing graphics wise. (water effects, one of first 3d games, T-Rex!!). Infact you could argue it was the Sands of Time of its generation - excellent acrobatic exploring in classic POP style, but with poorer combat. TR2 was pretty cool too, but no major improvement.

By TR3 it was looking very dated. They never really improved the graphics or controls (analogue sticks?? hello?) and even toned down the cool exploring that was fun in the first games. Still. At the time the first one was great.

Imagine if they were still releasig games like JK itoday instead of moving on to ones like JO and JA. Hang on... bad example ;-)

[edlib]

It's probably not all that different than the Xbox... it's just that I find all the GC controls insanely touchy, and therefore almost impossible to make subtle movements without overshooting. A tiny movement on one of the sticks translates to a huge change on the screen.

 

With some games it isn't a problem. With this one I found it impossible to line up a clean shot, and as a result could never get past the first group of enemies.

If I spent more time with it maybe I could get accustomed to the sensitivity... but the level of frustration I'd have to endure to get to that point would be enormous, and I simply don't have that kind of time anymore.

 

I might trade that one in and get it for PC. Arrow key movement and mouse targeting are more my speed for FPSes anyway. Feels far more natural to me.

[Darth Groovy]

Actually, the way Lara Croft looks is absolute undying proof that video games are designed by geeks without girl friends. I don't agree how all video game vixens are big breasted scantily clad bimbos. It's not only stereotypical, but annoying. I've even seen some shots of Samus in recent days, showing clevage...give me a freaking break.

 

Edlib, once you get past the boobage and sloppy voice overs, Tomb Raider is actually a VERY fun game. It's a basic parallel to any Indianna Jones type adventure. Early puzzle solving, and lots of ancient traps.....and swimming LOTS of swimming (Groovy loves the swimming games, cuz Groovy likes to swim ). You can probably get a PSX or even a PC copy of the first Tomb Raider for about $.99 now. Subsequent sequals failed to capture the fun of the first game.....or so I heard.

 

Ninja Gaiden (XBOX)

 

Remake of the classic Tecmo Beat-em-up side scroller for NES, only not NEAR as fun. In fact....it's so hard to play, it's not even worth playing. (sad thing is, I bought the XBOX just for this game, because Ninja Gaiden was one of my absolute favorites on the NES.) The first level has you jumping a up cliffs....no bad guys....no nothing....just jumping. Once you finally get to the top, you might get to pick off a couple of bad guys, but watch your step....once you fall....you get to start all the way back to the begininning again. They make RYU look amazing....his moves are astonishing...but the learning curve on this game is so hard....that it lost virtually ALL of it's arcade charm in the translation. I tried to convince myself it was a good game....I practiced at it...and what I got was several hours of swearing, and controller abuse. Finally, I sold it off about a month ago. Not worth it. Supposedly there is a Ninja Gaiden Black coming out, that is supposed to curve the difficulity level and make it more user freindly, plus boasts an unlockable version of the Tecmo classic. We'll have to see about this.

 

Score: 50% (for beautiful, yet wasted graphics)

[jon_hill987]

I never played it but I do remember that the game Big Brother 2 (from the (for some reason) popular reality TV show) was awarded 0 out of 100 by PCGamer (UK)

 

That has to be a bad game.

 

BB1 got 2% i think, so not much better.

[Bob Lion54]

0/100?!?!

 

I've got to read that review.

 

And yes, I have played Catwoman. All of 7 min. The controls where so horrible on that game. I wanted to see Haley Berry in all her pixelated glory. I just couldn't get past the terrible controls. Oh, well. I felt like a beta tester.

[ET Warrior]

Ninja Gaiden (XBOX)

 

Ninja Gaiden on Xbox is one of my all time favorite Xbox games. The hardness was part of it for me, it's a game that forces you to be good at it, and is not at all forgiving...I LOVE that game...

 

Myst. (PC)

 

I am forced to agree that you have to love puzzle games to get anything out of Myst..but I do love me some puzzles, so I like it, but it's easy to see how it could be rather not at all likeable.

[BongoBob]

Hey groovves, get Ninja Gaiden Black, it's got an easy mode

 

*is waiting for black*

[Master_Ginn]

Lets not forgetn Hitman Contracts. I didn't think sequals could be worse than the original. You could never sneak by anyone, even if you had stolen a costume. It basically was a run in a shoot everything game.

[ET Warrior]

^^^^

 

That's right, I forgot that game. IT was so lame, no matter how hard you tried stealth was pretty much impossible, because nobody would buy your outfits....Totally lame, and then it was so easy to just whip out the guns and run through slaughtering everyone....

stupid stupid.

[lukeskywalker1]

Rebel Assualt II anyone?

[toms]

- Yeah, the rebel assault games WERE pretty rubbish... and they looked sooo pretty in the screenshots too

 

(and while we are at it, lets include Rebel Assault 3D, or Rebel Strike as is is better known. Only worth it for the 80s starwars arcade game extras.)

 

- Can't believe i forgot Force Commander. Boy i was excited about that. Boy it sucked. I especially liked the interface that looked like something designed by an 8 year old with photoshop. (or maybe MS paint)

 

- XIII was a little twitchy on xbox now you mention it. I turned the sensitivity down a notch, but i think after a level or two you get used to it. I forgot about it.

 

- Ninja Gaiden on XBOX is an awesome game...But the first level Boss is probably the 2nd hardest in the game (and it IS a hard game). Once you get to the next few levels, and start working out the VERY PRECISE timing and techniques needed to beat it it does become awesome. It can be insanely hard and frustrating at times, but the feeling of satisfaction when you pull off an awesome combo and beat it is unmatched.

Tip: Block ALL THE TIME... random button mashing will get you killed in seconds.

 

PS/ The producer is of the opinion that if you aren't a good enough gamer to beat it, then you aren't the sort of gamer he wants playing his game anyway. So I wouldn't be surprised if he calls the Easy mode is called "Loser Mode" or something in NG Black... ;-) [edit]its called Dog mode.

PPS/ Wasn't there a content download that modified the entire game and made it even harder? [edit] hurricane packs infact. After beating it on normal I didn't even TRY it on hard.

 

One of the biggest additions, however, is the addition of Dog mode and Master Ninja mode in the difficulty options. Master Ninja mode is unlocked only by beating the hard, and then very hard difficulty settings. Let it be known that you can basically not get hit in Master Ninja mode. At the very start you're assaulted by red ninjas, who throw explosive shurikens at you and can kill you in three simple hits -- which means you need to collect EVERY health elixir you find, use them all, and block like a maniac. While we haven't gotten as far as the bosses in this mode yet (even the first boss, Murai), it wouldn't be too crazy to think that they could one-shot-kill you. Team Ninja director Tomonobu Itagaki reckons that no more than a "couple hundred people will ever beat this mode."

Perhaps even more interesting is the Dog mode, which is Ninja Gaiden Black's equivalent of an "easy" difficulty setting. Let's be clear that this mode isn't particularly easy, but it does assist you in certain ways, like giving you extra health items in the form of "Ayane's rations," which Dead or Alive fan-favorite Ayane leaves behind for Ryu to find. Unlocking Dog mode is handled in an interesting way. By Itagaki's estimation, most players, on their first play through of the game "die ten times on normal mode by the time they even meet Murai," which, if true, will reveal how many times one needs to fail before they are given the option to "abandon the way of the ninja." If you choose "yes," you will be asked for confirmation a few more times as if to drive the point home. Having agreed to this debasement, you'll be treated to a rather humiliating cutscene in which you are forevermore labeled a "ninja dog" for the entirety of your current play through of the game. Your reward for playing on Ninja Dog difficulty is that no matter how well you do, your end of level ranking will always be "ninja dog," and everywhere you go, you'll be wearing a bright purple ribbon on your wrist, indicating your failure as a true ninja.