Diego Varen Posted August 2, 2006 Share Posted August 2, 2006 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Power of Love ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Love is a forbidden part of the old Jedi Order. Love was known as a path to the dark side. Love also led to many other emotions. Fear, anger and hate. All these emotions lead to suffering. Only some have been able to remain on the path of the light with these emotions. However, love is the hardest emotion to hold. The exile, Jaden Lennon is one of those people who can control his emotions easily. It is the Power of Love. ***** Jaden was sitting in the cockpit of the Ebon Hawk, trying to decide his next destination. Where could he and his companions go? Jaden had decided not to go to Telos, to stay low for a while. He couldn’t bear to see the Jedi master, Atris after the duel they had had, prior to the battle over Telos. Jaden sighed and stood up. He put the controls of the Ebon Hawk on autopilot and he left the cockpit to see if there was anyone else awake. ***** Walking through the whole interior of the Ebon Hawk, Jaden noticed that nearly everyone was asleep. Atton, Bao-Dur, Visas and Mira were fast asleep in both dormitories, port and starboard. Even the Assassin Droid, HK-47 and the Utility Droid, T3-M4 had been shut down as well. The only person that Jaden knew was awake was the Handmaiden, Brianna. Jaden decided to go to the Cargo Hold, which was where she usually practised her Echani Training. ***** In the doorway, Jaden had been watching Brianna training for five minutes. She was so passionate about her training, that it didn’t make her aware anything else. Even a smuggler could sneak in and she wouldn’t notice. “Nice moves.” Jaden commented, making Brianna jump. “Oh Jaden, what are you doing up so late?” She asked. Jaden shrugged. “Well I could ask you the same thing,” Jaden told her, “I couldn’t sleep. I’ve been at the controls for over an hour, trying to make me tired. So why couldn’t you sleep?” “Like you, I couldn’t sleep either,” Brianna told him, “I decided to practise my Echani Training, it usually helps to tire me out.” Jaden laughed. Nothing really made him tired. The only thing that made him feel tired was thinking. Whether it was thinking about his next destination or how to fix some cables, anything would make him tired. Though tonight, things were different. Perhaps training with Brianna would help. “Can I train with you?” Jaden asked. “Sure,” She told him, “Remember, we mustn’t wear many clothes.” “Surely I could break that rule for once?” Jaden asked, “I’ve been feeling a bit chilly on this ship.” “We mustn’t break traditions,” Brianna told him, “Surely you should know that.” “Yeah you’re right,” Jaden told her, “Let’s get started.” ***** The training was longer than Jaden expected. So many punches and kicks to dodge, so many strengths and weaknesses to focus on in the opponent and so many techniques to use in a battle. The Echani ways were very different, compared to the Jedi. It was as if the Echani longed for battle, while the Jedi tried to forbid it. Of course, Jaden had trained with Brianna before, but this time it was different. Now he had returned to his Jedi ways and he had forgotten the three lessons he had learnt with Brianna. ***** After an hour of training, Jaden fell to the floor exhausted. He couldn’t get up. Brianna walked over to him and helped him up. “Are you tired now?” She asked. “Yeah,” Jaden told her, panting, “Thank you for the training, it really helps to pass the time.” “Yeah it does,” Brianna told him, agreeing, “I think I’ll stay up for a while and train for a while.” Jaden was about to leave when he knew he had to say something to Brianna. “Brianna.” Jaden said. “Yeah.” Brianna replied. “I… I…” Jaden started, “I… I love you!” Brianna was obviously startled by the news. She hadn’t expected this from Jaden. Both of them were very good friends, despite the short time they had spent together. She decided to say something back. “To be honest, I’ve felt the same,” She told Jaden, “I love you too.” Jaden was also startled. “Well that’s good.” Jaden told her. “What do you like best about me?” Brianna asked. “Well I…” Jaden started, thinking about what to say, “I think you have a great personality and you care for other people, despite how annoying they could be.” “Anything else?” She asked. “Not that I know of.” Jaden told her. Both of them remained silent for a minute. What was there to say now? If word spread about their feelings for each other, there would be some surprised reactions from the others. Jaden decided to make the first move. He walked up to Brianna and he put his arms round her waist. Brianna put her arms around Jaden’s upper body. Both of them stared into each others eyes for a moment. Jaden pulled in for a kiss, when Brianna suddenly broke away. “No,” She said, “No we shouldn’t be doing this.” “What why not?” Jaden asked. “You know why,” Brianna told him, “Love is forbidden for the Jedi, you of all people should know that.” “How did you know that?” Jaden asked. “Atris told me.” Brianna told him. Jaden laughed. “Surely you can’t believe everything Atris says.” Jaden told her. “It is true though,” She told him, “I mean, look at Jolee Bindo.” “Jolee is an cryptic old fool and he always has been,” Jaden told her, “Besides, I would be very surprised if the old fool was still alive. Now we should concentrate on us and our feelings for each other.” “But…” Brianna started. Jaden immediately stopped her and he forced himself to kiss her. The kiss seemed to last forever. Jaden could feel Brianna’s lips brush alongside his and it was a wonderful thing to feel. Eventually the two broke away. “Goodnight Brianna.” He whispered. He turned to leave, but Brianna stopped him. “Why did we fall in love?” Brianna asked. Jaden shrugged. “Either the Force works in mysterious ways or it could be the Power of Love.” Jaden told her. ***** Now that he had left Brianna, he could decide where he wanted to go. Telos. Jaden immediately ran to the cockpit and set the next course for Telos. All was going well for Jaden. Though he knew something would go wrong. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The End ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Doctor Posted August 2, 2006 Share Posted August 2, 2006 Briliant. The coloured text gets to me, but that's just me, probably. I think shorts work better for both of us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diego Varen Posted August 2, 2006 Author Share Posted August 2, 2006 Briliant. The coloured text gets to me, but that's just me, probably. I think shorts work better for both of us. I have to agree, usually red is the worst for me (Don't kill me RH). I only used it for this Fic, because I like using different colours for different Fics that I write. Yeah, Short Fics are better for both of us. I'll have to read your other Short Fics. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jason Skywalker Posted August 3, 2006 Share Posted August 3, 2006 I really liked this one. Also, is it just me or did you spelt "any" wrong by adding an m before any? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diego Varen Posted August 3, 2006 Author Share Posted August 3, 2006 I really liked this one. Also, is it just me or did you spelt "any" wrong by adding an m before any? I don't think so. Anyway, thanks for replying Jason. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Catto Posted August 4, 2006 Share Posted August 4, 2006 I enjoyed it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jae Onasi Posted August 5, 2006 Share Posted August 5, 2006 I liked some of the training details. I could feel Jaden's fatigue. I had to giggle just a little--when someone declares their love for someone else, they usually don't say it from across the room. They get close, snuggle together or even just hold a hand, but usually don't stand 20 feet away from eacy other. I'd have picked something a little more romantic for Jaden to say after Brianna tells him she loves him besides "Well, that's good." However, that's a personal opinion. So why does Jaden love Brianna? Why does he have to force himself to kiss her if he loves her? I'm not knocking the story, I just want to know how it came to be that way. Grammar's good, so is spelling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediMaster12 Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 I thought the declaration to be a little out of place. I would have expected it from a drunken Exile but hey it's your fic. I would have probably have him say something that he was fine and he walks away with a different kind of feeling. It just adds to it. Love is gradual though sometimes spontaneous is a good thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted August 8, 2006 Share Posted August 8, 2006 well, the "i love you" bit was kinda 'jerky', IMO. maybe Exile should have gotten closer to Brianna like Jae said and he should have declared it firmly, instead of stammering, but the story's good anyway. well done! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Catto Posted August 8, 2006 Share Posted August 8, 2006 Perhaps, Exile just was just plainly confused whether or not this would be the best time for it, and before he oculd do anything, he just blurted it out. Hey, i know lol, ive did it plenty of times :D hahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diego Varen Posted August 8, 2006 Author Share Posted August 8, 2006 I can't believe this Thread is still getting replies . Anyway, I tried to make this Fic as realistic as possible. When someone fancies another person, sometimes they can be nervous. That was what I was trying to show with the Exile. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediKnight707 Posted August 14, 2006 Share Posted August 14, 2006 The I love you was just like WHAM! right in your face. I mean, it kinda jumps from being good friends to be lovers. Other than that, not to bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diego Varen Posted August 14, 2006 Author Share Posted August 14, 2006 As others had said, it was slightly rushed and I agree. Maybe one day I'll correct it. Thanks JK. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CSI Posted October 6, 2006 Share Posted October 6, 2006 Another short fic from Prof. Romance, huh? Nice job done, Pott! If you don't mind, I'd like to read all your fic and leave some comments, it that ok? Of course it's OK to leave comments. Please do! --Jae Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.