The Ruin a Wish Foundation

[Rinku]

granted but then the original moon crashes into earth and ends all life....

 

I wish I could go get wiifit

[Bokken]

Granted, you can fit inside Wii.

 

I wish that I had a Swedish Firesteel.

[Alkonium]

Granted, but it's as hot as fire.

 

I wish I was more influential

[Bokken]

Granted, but you cause everyone to become like you, and the world is now like 1984.

 

I wish that my cat had tuna breath.

[ForeverNight]

Granted, but the cat hates tuna and decides that life sucks.

 

I wish that Wing Commander actually worked well on a NT-based OS.

[Alkonium]

Granted, said NT based OS being the original Windows NT only.

 

I wish Paul McGann would appear again on Doctor Who.

[ForeverNight]

Granted, but in the middle of filming the episode the studio disappears in a gigantic fireball.

 

I wish that I actually liked my state's football (U.S.) team.

[Alkonium]

Granted, but you're the only one who does.

 

I wish to be sexiest man alive.

[Bokken]

Granted, but you are sexy...to men.

 

I wish that emulators weren't laggy.

[CommanderQ]

Granted, but they move so fast that nothing on there works.

 

I wish I were the strongest man alive.

[Ztalker]

Granted, but Chuck Norris doesn't like you claiming his title and kicks your ass.

 

I'd wish I had a cool beard (again).

[CommanderQ]

Granted, but when your trying to escape an exploding building, it gets stuck on the door and you can't escape.

 

I wish I had an awesome helmet.

[Alkonium]

Granted, but it's really heavy and lacks airholes.

 

I wish I was the Pyro.

[CommanderQ]

Granted, but your powers get out of control and you catch on fire.

 

I wish my tea tasted better.

[Endorenna]

Granted, now it tastes like castor oil.

 

I wish my computer DVD player would work.

[Rinku]

Granted but now it is no longer a computer, now it is an alien :|

 

I wish I could type 5000000000 words a minute.

[CommanderQ]

Granted, but your hands become so smart, they wonder why they have to take your orders and they rebel.

 

I wish I could run super fast.

[Chevron 7 locke]

granted. But you run so fast your legs fly off

 

I wish I could travel into alternate universes

[Alkonium]

Granted, you're stuck in a parallel universe in which the Black Mesa incident really happened.

 

I wish people got what I was referencing when I reference obscure stuff.

[Chevron 7 locke]

Granted but people hate you for it and kill you on the spot.

 

I wish I could travel into the internet

[Alkonium]

Granted, but you get deleted.

 

I wish the sonic crowbar idea made sense.

[Chevron 7 locke]

Granted. But then everything becomes sonic due to the laws of nature no longer making sense.

 

I wish I had the ability to go SS and take over the world

[Alkonium]

Granted. You take over the world by killing everyone else, and now you feel lonely and guilty.

 

I wish for the TF gun from El Goonish Shive.

[Chevron 7 locke]

Granted. But it turns you into a girl and now your stuck in los vegas making money as a showgirl.

 

I wish I had a themesong similiar to duel of the fates

[CommanderQ]

Granted, but it's so horrible that your ears blow out, and you can't hear it.

 

I wish I had the Death Star.