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But now we learn about the best president everrrrrr.

 

polk.jpg

 

 

In 1844, the Democrats were split

The three nominees for the presidential candidate

Were Martin Van Buren, a former president and an abolitionist

James Buchanan, a moderate

Louis Cass, a general and expansionist

From Nashville came a dark horse riding up

He was James K. Polk, Napoleon of the Stump

 

Austere, severe, he held few people dear

His oratory filled his foes with fear

The factions soon agreed

He's just the man we need

To bring about victory

Fulfill our manifest destiny

And annex the land the Mexicans command

And when the votes were cast the winner was

Mister James K. Polk, Napoleon of the Stump

 

In four short years he met his every goal

He seized the whole southwest from Mexico

Made sure the tarriffs fell

And made the English sell the Oregon territory

He built an independent treasury

Having done all this he sought no second term

But precious few have mourned the passing of

Mister James K. Polk, our eleventh president

Young Hickory, Napoleon of the Stump

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Day 1

 

Mommy, I am only 8 inches long, but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it, I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.

 

Day 2

 

Mommy, today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me, you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here.

 

Day 3

 

You know what Mommy, I'm a girl!! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad. It makes me sad too, and I cry with you even though you can't hear me.

 

Day 4

 

Mommy, my hair is starting to grow. It is very short and fine, but I will have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes, and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too.

 

Day 5

 

You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby Mommy, your baby. I think and feel. Mommy, what's abortion?

 

Day 6

 

I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor called it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy!! HELP me!! No . . .

 

Day 7

 

Mommy, I am okay. I am in Jesus's arms. he is holding me. He did the Mash, he did the Monster Mash!!! He did the Mash! The Monster Mash! It was a graveyard smash!!!

 

more like

 

Day 1

 

"UNGHHHHHHHHHHH"

 

Day 2

 

"mommy why u do ur brofr

 

 

i haev 5 eyez and 4 of them hurt"

 

Day 3

 

"mommy wuts raep

 

mommy why was u raepd

 

everythign hurtz"

 

Day 4

 

"my brain shouldn't even be working at this point in development"

 

Day 5

 

"whats abortion

 

will it make this pain stop

 

will it get rid of the webbings between my fingers"

 

Day 6

 

"what the **** is poking me"

 

Day 7

 

"i guess i'm dead. wish it could've happened sooner. see you later you incestuous garbage."

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Day 1

 

HIVE MIND, I AM ONLY 8, BUT MY DEVELOPMENT HAS NOT BEEN IMPEDED SEVERELY, RESULTING IN FULLY-FUNCTIONAL ORGANS AND LIMBS. ALTHOUGH AT THE MOMENT I CANNOT MOVE THEM, SOON I WILL BE READY TO CARRY OUT THE WILL OF THE QUEEN.

 

Day 2

 

HIVE MIND, YOU WILL BE PLEASED TO KNOW MY CLAWS ARE BEGINNING TO FORM. ONE DAY I HOPE TO STRIKE DOWN THE TERRAN MENACE WITH THEM.

 

Day 3

 

TODAY I HAVE RECOGNIZED MY GENDER AND TASK, HIVE MIND. IT APPEARS I AM AN ATTACK DRONE. IT SADDENS ME TO KNOW THAT I AM UNABLE TO ASSIST THE QUEEN IN BEARING MORE SPAWN AS A WORKER, BUT NONETHELESS I WILL DO MY DUTY WITHOUT A MOMENTS HESITATION.

 

Day 4

 

I AM GLAD TO INFORM THE HIVE THAT MY SCALES AND TEETH ARE BEGINNING TO HARDEN, AS ARE MY CLAWS. I AM BEGINNING TO SECRET MUCUS FOR MY EVENTUAL HATCHING.

 

Day 5

 

HIVE MIND, TODAY A WORKER INSPECTED MY EGG AND I COULD NOT HELP BUT OVERHEAR I AM UNFIT FOR COMBAT. WHY IS THIS, MY QUEEN? WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THE INABILITY TO SERVE YOU AND THE GLORIOUS HIVE? FORGIVE ME; I MEAN NOT TO TALK BACK AGAINST YOU. IT IS MY FAULT ALONE FOR MY UNSUCCESFUL BIRTHING. PERHAPS ONE DAY I CAN EMERGE FROM MY COCOON.

 

Day 6

 

SOMETHING IS INTRUDING THE HIVE. I CAN FEEL IT. MY QUEEN, A THOUSAND PARDONS FOR FAILING YOU. MY ONLY WISH WAS TO DIE IN COMBAT. HOWEVER I SEEM FIT ONLY TO SEEK DEMISE FROM A HUMAN.

IT HURTS.

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