ForceFightWMe12 Posted February 17, 2006 Author Share Posted February 17, 2006 Thanks guys Alright, when did I post the last one? The 11th? Alright...the next chapter'll be due out...say...25th of February. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted February 24, 2006 Share Posted February 24, 2006 awesome chapter FFWM12!! im sorry i didnt reply earlier, but with my exams... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForceFightWMe12 Posted February 24, 2006 Author Share Posted February 24, 2006 Thanks, RC How did you exams go? AACK! I just realized my deadline is tomorrow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted February 25, 2006 Share Posted February 25, 2006 no actually, my exams are coming up, thats the prob. dont worry though, ill be around from time to time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mercenery74 Posted February 26, 2006 Share Posted February 26, 2006 I hope the new chapter is coming soon because this story is great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diego Varen Posted February 26, 2006 Share Posted February 26, 2006 I hope the new chapter is coming soon because this story is great. I agree with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mercenery74 Posted February 26, 2006 Share Posted February 26, 2006 I agree with you. Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediKnight707 Posted February 26, 2006 Share Posted February 26, 2006 @mercenery74 don't spam. And FFWM wasn't your chapter due yesterday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jae Onasi Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 All I can say is, wow! This is an interesting and fun story, and my jaw dropped when I saw your age.... I've read stuff by people in college that couldn't hold a candle to what you have here. Your ability to paint pictures with words/conversations is terrific. Don't be afraid to show it to your Eng. teacher either--she may not be into SW stuff, but good writing is good writing, regardless of the subject/genre. I caught some spelling errors, but nothing big. When you hit high school (and I daresay, college), pick up as many Eng. classes/creative writing classes as you can--the more you write/read other good writing, the easier it will be to develop your talent even further. Now don't ignore school for writing this fic, but I'll enjoy seeing the next installment just like everyone else here. Good job and keep it up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForceFightWMe12 Posted March 1, 2006 Author Share Posted March 1, 2006 Thanks Jae I've actually been looking to jump into the honors English and things once next year begins...pretty exciting, actually (she's excited about school? What's wrong with her?!?!?! ) and thanks for then encouragment. I'm glad you like my story! Alright, I've been trying to update for the past couple of days but, wonders of wonders, my computer froze every single time I've tried to post the next chapter. Yay. So, this is about the...tenth time I'm rewritting this post. Good news and bad news. Bad news, this chapter was cut a bit short because I couldn't figure out how to end it yet Good news, this and the next chapter should be the last without romance. I know, you're crushed. Anyway....chapter Fifteen. Enjoy ___________________________________________________________ ---Chapter Fifteen--- “You guys doing alright?” Revan asked, pushing his way through the motes of dust and cobwebs that his feet kicked up as he continued down the northern hallway. “I’m fine,” came Bastila’s voice, “But I’ll be better once I get out of these cobwebs.” “Nothing much here. Just a lot of d-du-ACHOO! Dust.” came Carth’s reply. “Don’t tell me we’re arachnophobia now, Bastila?” Revan asked, a small smile playing over his face as he pushed away another curtain of the thin, sticky web. “Of course not!” “Hehaha, I can see the headline on the holonets now! Galaxy’s most famous Jedi prodigy, afraid of spiders!” Oh, be quiet, Carth. Revan heard what sounded like a rock falling and bouncing across the flagstones. Now suddenly alert, he brandished his blaster, taking it in his right hand. His left hand crossed over his right at the wrists, holding his flashlight parallel to the blaster’s barrel. If he had activated his lightsaber, it would have shown his full face and body, giving away information that could come in handy, should someone attack. Though now as he scanned the ancient hallway, he saw he needn’t have bothered. There was no one there. Though as he took in deep breaths to calm himself, he felt the air currents in the tunnel change. In an enclosed space like that, it only meant one thing: someone other than himself was moving around in that tunnel. “Hey guys, keep your eyes peeled. There’s something strange going on here…” ~*~*~ “Guys, something’s wrong.” the Exile said, jogging into the cantina, and spotting the table where Mira and Atton were sitting. “I just overheard one of the judges. There’re Mandalorians, mercenaries, they’re after the others--” “Hold on there, space boy.” Mira said, “All I understood was ‘overheard’.” “What’s going on, Elron?” Atton asked, his expression serious for once. He was even gathering up the pazzack decks…and scooping a few extra credits into his lap along with them. “Duulas, one of the Selkath judges at the high courts, he’s got some kind of grudge against Revan.” Elron explained, calmer this time. “And he somehow figured out where Revan was going. He’s already sent ahead Mandalorian mercenaries to the Rift. They’re going to ambush the others.” “What??” both Scoundrels asked, simultaneously. “We have to help them. Somehow.” Elron said. ~*~*~ “Hey guys, keep your eyes peeled. There’s something strange going on here…” “I know…I can feel it too.” Carth turned the high beam of his flashlight on, illuminating the room before him. He had reached the end of his corridor, and had spent the past few minutes gazing around and studying the room before him. It seemed almost to be some kind of…training room, maybe? He went to a console, and brushed off the dust. He hit what he thought was the button to turn it on, but the screen just flashed green, two yellow characters coming up, before sparking uncontrollably and burning his hand. “Damn.” he murmured, shielding his eyes from the bright sparks. “Well, so much for this getting easier.” He scanned the walls. Perhaps he’d find something here… “Revan?” “Here.” “I reached the end of the hallway. It’s a room…looks almost like a training room of sorts…” “Well, we won’t know what it is until we can study it closely enough. Are there any symbols or hieroglyphics anywhere? Any kind of writing at all?” “There was a consol, but it practically blew up in my face when I tried to turn it on. But…” Carth ran the beam of his flashlight over the walls, peering at the markings closely. “It looks almost as if there was some kind of mural or painting or something here…” “You have your data scanner, right?” “Yeah,” the Admiral answered, attaching a sliver of metal into a slot on his datapad. He hit a button, and the edge of the metal lit up green, sending a beam of the same color light onto the wall. Carth opted to create a larger grid, then began to sweep the surface of the stone with the light methodically, being careful to capture every detail possible. Once finished, he uploaded it to the datapad, and now had an exact recreation of the carvings on the wall saved on his datapad. “And I’m one step ahead of you.” ~*~*~ As the beam of light swept through the dust, penetrating the darkness, the Jedi Counselor behind it had her senses on full alert. She felt something different in the air and the dust…it had a smell to it. She knew that ancient places often did, but this was different… Then there were the sounds she was hearing. Every once in a while, she would hear a tapping or something of the like that would make her jump, stop, and scan the area, only to see that her fears were unfounded when the hallway was empty. The stone hallway took a sharp right up ahead, and she headed for it cautiously. Who knew what would be hiding behind it? She took the turn, her deactivated saber out and ready-- “Hello there, sweet.” She was met with a Mandalorian in full battle armor, his face hidden behind that damnable T-visored helmet. Before she could do anything but bring her saber up, the Mandalorian sprayed…something in her face. Her instincts told her not to breath, but even to do the Force-technique to save her, she had to draw in at least one breath. “Bastard.” she choked out, before getting her saber unsheathed, but her opponent seemed ready for it. He had twin vibroblades out in the blink of an eye, and their blades clashed, illuminating the gloom. “Not bad. Though I have to believe that the Jedi-beauty everyone talks about is rather overrated.” the voice said from beneath the visor. Bastila ignored the comment. If she was going to top out this man, she would have to keep her wits about her and stay calm. She was able to pin both his arms above his head, rendering the blades useless, and then laid him flat with a kick to the gut. She placed the glowing yellow blade to his neck, looking down at the Mandalorian with distaste. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” Bastila whipped around, only to feel the butt of a rifle get slammed into her jaw. The dizzying blow dropped her in an instant. As she crumpled to the ground, the Jedi could have sworn her jaw was shattered. She recovered after a moment, and looked at the second man that had come from behind her. He too was a Mandalorian. And now, as she looked down the blaster barrel, she saw that a laser-sight had been attached to the muzzle. Not surprisingly, when she looked down, the laser was trained right on her heart. What was surprising, was that there was more than one. She gasped, choking down panic. There were at least ten other red dots on her person. There was a whole army down here. And by the Jedi’s guess, she wasn’t the only one they were after… ~*~*~ Carth nearly jumped out of his skin at the noise. What the hell was that? He turned back to the door, his flashlight piercing through the darkness and motes of dust. Nothing. The air currents of the room changed as the sound reached the Admiral’s ears again, this time followed with the sound of wind being sucked in, and a sound that rattled like bones. “Double damn.” Carth murmured, pulling his blaster from its holster. If there was anything down here, he wasn’t about to let it get the jump on him. There was a second sound of gushing air, this one much closer, and the soldier knew exactly what it was. He whipped around, only to be met with the hilt of a vibroblade. Blood poured down the Admiral’s face from his broken nose. Realizing far too late that he wasn’t alone, Carth rolled backwards, away from whatever had attacked him. He ripped a cloth from his belt and put it beneath his nose, trying to staunch the flow of blood as he raised his blaster to confront his attacker. “Typical Republic incompetence.” the voice said from behind the T-visor. “Mandalorians.” Carth said, feeling his own blood leak through the fabric and down his hand. However, in a second, the Mandalorian fell over, a melted hole in the dead-center of his T-visor. He placed a second round into the man’s chest, just to be sure. He then scanned the room again, reaching for his comm. as he dropped the now blood-soaked cloth. “Revan, Bastila, come in! We’ve got trouble! Repeat, we are not alone!” ~*~*~ “Revan, Bastila, come in! We’ve got trouble! Repeat, we are not alone!” Thanks for the early warning. Revan thought sarcastically as one of his double-blades whipped around, neatly severing a mercenary head. As he retreated down the hallway, he called into the comm. “Group back at the sub. First one there, start the engines and prepare to get the hell out of here. Repeat, retreat to the sub!” The Knight redirected a blaster shot, sending it ricocheting into the wall, and causing a landslide of the ancient plaster. The commotion and disturbance it created gave Revan the perfect smokescreen to bolt. “Bastila?! Carth?! Someone, answer me!” He got static with scattered, unrelated noises, none sounding like Carth or Bastila. The mercs were jamming their frequency. Another chain of blaster shots came from ahead, one grazing by Revan’s shoulder. Anxious about his friends and tired of having to deal with this kind of thing, Revan used the Force to propel him in a leap, allowing him to slice straight through the mercenaries ahead without even having to put a foot down. He was finally able to gain the main room, where there were, of course, more mercenaries and Mandalorians waiting for him. “Stop, Knight!” one of the Mandalorians called out in a hard, commanding voice. “Heh, yeah right!” Revan called back, his saber slicing easily through another helmeted head. “Stop…” the same man said. He motioned someone forward and Revan froze instantly, “Or she gets it.” The mercenary the Mandalorian had motioned forward had Bastila. Her saber arm was forced up and behind her back, a vibrosword at her exposed neck. She struggled slightly, but the Knight knew it was futile. “Revan!” she was able to choke out. “Put your weapons down.” the guy in charge said, waving a blaster barrel in Revan’s face, “Now.” He slowly bent over, laying his saber on the ground. Revan then pulled out his blaster, and set it down as well. “Pick them up.” the same guy said to another merc, who obeyed immediately. “What did you do?” Revan asked, “Pick up the whole mercenary population of Manaan and follow us down here? I can’t think of anyone I would’ve pissed off bad enough to send all of you to the bottom of the seafloor. Hell, why not shoot me in the streets?” “Our employer wants things done quietly and efficiently.” the Mandalorian said, “And no more questions.” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jae Onasi Posted March 1, 2006 Share Posted March 1, 2006 Nicely done there. I'm enjoying the adventure. Your cliffhangers leave your fans wanting more.... If I have a fairly large post, I've learned to write it in Word (I'm sure any word processing program would work fine) and then copy and paste it into the reply window when I'm on the forum. That way, if the computer has fits, I don't have to re-type the entire thing. If I happen to be offline, I have my own copy if for some reason I need to review or edit something. I liked school, too. Nothing wrong with that. My grandmother used to tell me, 'the knowledge is never wasted.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hallucination Posted March 1, 2006 Share Posted March 1, 2006 Another Forcefight-tacular chapter, Forcefight (Congrats, you're name has become and adjective!). It gets three thumbs up! now where did I put that third one.... But unless Bastilla embodies fear of spiders, she's arachnophobic, not arachnophobia . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForceFightWMe12 Posted March 2, 2006 Author Share Posted March 2, 2006 If I have a fairly large post, I've learned to write it in Word (I'm sure any word processing program would work fine) and then copy and paste it into the reply window when I'm on the forum. That way, if the computer has fits, I don't have to re-type the entire thing. If I happen to be offline, I have my own copy if for some reason I need to review or edit something. I do the same thing, though I don't save the post in the beginning (Author's Note) with the chapter, so when my browser freezes, I have to repost the Author's note again. Anyway, glad you like it! :D Awesome, I'm an adjective!! Thanks, Hal. And I seriously have to turn off that auto-correct thing...my Word didn't like arachnophobic, and it obviously took it into its own hands to change it...grr... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediKnight707 Posted March 2, 2006 Share Posted March 2, 2006 Where's that computer?? I'm gonna kick its machine ***. Great chapter. Nice adjective usage Hall Hope there's SOME romance in the next one. I mean, I'll settle for a hug. Keep 'em comin' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renegade Puma Posted March 2, 2006 Share Posted March 2, 2006 Great chapter Forcefight! Although I can't see a Jedi putting down his lightsaber for anything. But in this case I understand that these certain Jedi aren't quite normal. And they are in love So when's the next deadline? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MdKnightR Posted March 3, 2006 Share Posted March 3, 2006 I loved the chapter, but I did detect an error. Bastilla is a Sentinel, not a Consular. I can't wait to see what happens next! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForceFightWMe12 Posted March 3, 2006 Author Share Posted March 3, 2006 Well you know, Counselor, Sentinel, same thing Oh, and MK, I remember I needed to ask you something...ah yes. Here it is: You know, I have been influenced as well, but I am no writer. I think I may start a new painting based on the scene of Bastila with Revan in the library. Have him looking out the window with his back to the viewer so that all you see is his silhouette. Maybe have Bastilla in the extreme foreground so that all you see of her is the edge of her thigh and a hand holding a datapad. What do you think? Out of curiosity, did anything come of that? Thanks Renegade Yeah, Bastila and Revan...don't fall under your 'normal' catagory. Sorry Glad you liked it I wouldn't do that, now, JK. If you break my computer, I won't be able to post any new chapters Right, well, hug it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MdKnightR Posted March 4, 2006 Share Posted March 4, 2006 Not yet. Unfortunately, my life has been so busy lately that I haven't painted anything in months. I barely find the time to sit down and read the fan fiction anymore. If I get some time, I will try to get that idea on canvas. I have plenty of blank ones in my studio. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted March 5, 2006 Share Posted March 5, 2006 awesome work ForceFight!!! my first exam got over today and it was my last hindi exam EVER!! YAAAY!! and yesterday my baby sis turned 3 years old! great work once again, dudess. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediKnight707 Posted March 5, 2006 Share Posted March 5, 2006 ^Happy birthday to your sister RC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForceFightWMe12 Posted March 6, 2006 Author Share Posted March 6, 2006 ^^ What he said Thanks RC, glad your exams went well :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted March 6, 2006 Share Posted March 6, 2006 well, actually, the first exam went well the rest are yet to be done well on Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForceFightWMe12 Posted March 6, 2006 Author Share Posted March 6, 2006 Right, I totally knew that Well, glad the first went well and I hope the rest go just as smoothly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted March 7, 2006 Share Posted March 7, 2006 they will, get a chap ready as a freedom gift for me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seamhainn Posted March 8, 2006 Share Posted March 8, 2006 Any chance to get the story so far in one piece? I just jumed on the waggon... Take care Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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