Totenkopf Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Granted, but now it all dumps so bad that December is now the catastrophic winter month the world over, and it takes half a year everywhere to melt all the snow. Not to mention how cold runoff is for 6 months. Hypothermia and frosbite deaths rise, no water sports are safe for 90% of the world's population. I wish... duke nukem were real b/c we could all use a real hero that is badass. Granted, but Duke mistakes you for a bad guy and hilarity ensues as he stomps you into dust, spouting off a host of glib one-liners. I wish they'd just get the damn game finished and give the Duke his due. That must be a really ****ty retirement fund seeing as how it is only $787.29 left to go on all the remainders... The device will only be about ~100 watts, laser output ~10-15 Watts max output @ 10.6 microns...what were you tihnking, it was a terrawatt CW laser from SDI surplus??? (I wish...eewps!) Yeah, but ~$800 is all you'd have had left for your retirement after the economy crashes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Granted, but unfortunately they hire me and while it does get done satisfactorily well, I leave a gift at your house of all those well used dead animals during those tension relief breaks. Thanks for the delivery--it's the gift that keeps on giving. I wish a certain jester would try to hit on the closest thing in real life to chun li and his knee caps wind up getting shattered...and the video of it gets put up on youtube. Yeah, but ~$800 is all you'd have had left for your retirement after the economy crashes. <Makes a Beavis frown> This sucks. I'm gonna go get stuck in a pipe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totenkopf Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Granted, but after "chun li" has his knee caps shattered, he comes looking for you and puts a clip of caps in your @ss. He then puts that video on youtube as well. (also, I guess it's a good thing you left those carcases on bulk trash pickup day, but you'll be receiving a bill from the city for the pickup. ) I wish I had the midas touch, but that I could control it as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Granted, but the midas runs through your blood, and soon, the gold inside corrupts you, and your blood becomes gold, and we all know that a heart cannot pump gold....dun dun dunnnnn...... I wish I was skilled in the art of the Samurai Katana. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Granted, you and I decide to train and become masters (I'm into kendo too ) but one of your more traitorous followers decides to unload 10 clips into you and leave your corpse in the trash while you are demo-ing your skills to a crowd. Your deflections fail since a katana=/=lightsaber. And I'm stuck explaining what happened to you to all your students b/c now you are a master and a teacher. You also locked up your gear in your elite lockdown thing...so I cannot avenge you either. I wish Mr McVicker wasn't such a butt-burglar. but you'll be receiving a bill from the city for the pickup. How can they expect to get paid if I'm dead and my corpse is in my own trash dumpster with all those 'used' dead animals??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Granted, now...instead of the crass word of 'butt burglar,' he is a rear burglar. I wish there were no burglars to begin with. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totenkopf Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Granted, but now it's arsonists that attack homes, leaving the victims w/nothing at all. I wish tigers and polar bears were good eating. How can they expect to get paid if I'm dead and my corpse is in my own trash dumpster with all those 'used' dead animals??? The caps were in your @ss, not some critical part of your body. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Granted, they're excellent eating, but that's all you eat, and they go extinct. And you starve. I wish I had a steak dipped in cheese. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totenkopf Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 You get your hands on one, but it's the last thing you do b/c all the fat gives you a massive heart attack and you immediatley drop dead, unable to be resuscitated. I wish the Bob didn't hate you so much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Granted, but now he hates everyone else. I wish Bob had an army of Bobs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Granted, but now that pink star fish thing does what he does to them with pineapples and turns them into spongie-fied versions of themselves. The world burns from being annoyed. And it's all traced back to you so it's your fault. I wish the Macho Man Randy Savage didn't rap. The caps were in your @ss, not some critical part of your body. Well, I guess it's a good thing my ass cheeks got lots a paddin'. I decide to save myself the $$$: I dump all the used carcasses in that certain jester's house before he can get home. I mean after all, he's confined to a wheelchair, while I only have a bloodied right ass cheek. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totenkopf Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Granted, but now he serenades you to bed every night w/Gospel and CW tunes. I wish the road to hell were only paved w/bad intentions. Well, I guess it's a good thing my ass cheeks got lots a paddin'. I decide to save myself the $$$: I dump all the used carcasses in that certain jester's house before he can get home. I mean after all, he's confined to a wheelchair, while I only have a bloodied right ass cheek. If you read the reply correctly you'd realize it was "chun li" that ended up in a wheel chair before he put the caps in your @ss. He won't be so amused to find you've filled his house w/garbage. You better start running..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Granted, but now everyone is such a nauzeating do-gooder you puke all over yourself and die. I wish Marilyn Manson never dry humped anyone before in his life. Ah, I listen to the Savage gospel now do I? That would be interesting. Granted, but after "chun li" has his knee caps shattered, he comes looking for you and puts a clip of caps in your @ss. He then puts that video on youtube as well. (also, I guess it's a good thing you left those carcases on bulk trash pickup day, but you'll be receiving a bill from the city for the pickup. ) Ah. Overlooked her fail. Gotcha. (Runs into MRI room.) His gun gets stuck due to his outrage of pursuit. It tears off his pants, too. I whip out a sharp blade of polycarbonate. "C'mere!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Granted, but is wet-humped any better? I wish everyone made perfect sense. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 ^Granted, but unfortunately every time you try to be funny it either pisses someone off or it makes them cry. I wish Master Kavar was tougher to fight. --They made him too easy for a weapons master. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alkonium Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Granted, now he can 1 hit you. I wish Temuera Morrison would replace Dee Bradley Baker as the voice of the Clone Troopers in Star Wars: The Clone Wars. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Granted, but Dee Bradley Baker is angry, and shoots Temuera right before he begins recording. I wish Temuera Morrison's Jango Fett lived longer and fought harder, increasing in awesomeness... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Granted, but the character "Jango" lived out the rest of his life in the EU as a cripple. I wish electronics projects weren't so damn expensive... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Granted, now they are so cheap, even hobos can buy them, and there electronic projects are extremely hard to find. I wish I had a super computer, so I could play a game with 10 times better graphics then Crysis on Ultra, and still move mega fast.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alkonium Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Granted, but it causes your electric bill to increase exponentially. I wish I had pictures I could submit to Picture Is Unrelated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Granted, but unfortunately when you go searching for pictures the first ones you come across with the best criteria are disgusting nude pics, of you. I wish somebody would tell totenkopf to clean off his deck...all that **** is smelling up the city... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totenkopf Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Granted, but now that I've booted you and your animals off the deck, you're homeless again. I wish I got 5 cents anytime any episode of any Star Trek series was broadcast anywhere in the world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Granted, but now you have to pay taxes, and can only keep 5% of what little you got from the series. I wish I got 10 bucks every time a wish was ruined. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totenkopf Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Granted, but one of the wishes was for you to drop dead, so you can't enjoy any of your new found wealth. I wish the Penguins would win the Stanley Cup this year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Granted, but unfortunately one of those penguins was Chill Pengun from Mega Man X 1, revived and rebuilt. He massacres everyone upon victory. And he freezes you up into a block of ice. I wish you'd quit raping that aardvark's ears with your infernal bagpipe music. This is a forum, not Rowdy Roddy Piper's theme march. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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