Darth Avlectus Posted April 13, 2010 Share Posted April 13, 2010 Granted but you are assassinated after acceptance. I wish for Half Life 3 to be the best it possibly can be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alkonium Posted April 13, 2010 Share Posted April 13, 2010 Granted, but you die of natural causes before it's released. I wish for a job in which I could easily get any coworker I don't like fired. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted April 13, 2010 Share Posted April 13, 2010 Granted but now nobody will work with you for that company, you shoulder the majority of work and are worked to death because you can't quit as a stipulation until worker numbers return to normal which as I just said isn't happening. Finger effing a toilet while french kissing a light socket. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greggomonkey Posted April 13, 2010 Share Posted April 13, 2010 Granted, but the building you work in burns down shorty after you are employed and is never rebuilt. I wish for a pimp cane like Snoop Dogg. Edit: oops I was busy and didn't realize you 'plied. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alkonium Posted April 13, 2010 Share Posted April 13, 2010 @GTA: Wrong game, however: Granted, you die from electrocution. @greggo: Granted, your pimp cane looks exactly like Snoop Dogg, which people find weird and creepy. I wish I had the money to start an aggressive anti-bully initiative/campaign called Eliminate Bullying, Eliminate Bullies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted April 13, 2010 Share Posted April 13, 2010 Granted, but unfortunately it evolved into a legalized racketeering and pimping business. You are forever seen as the bane of humanity. (BTW, where's the smacks upside the head?) I wish to see Bayonetta and Morrigan Aensland fight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greggomonkey Posted April 14, 2010 Share Posted April 14, 2010 Granted, however when one wins and kills the other he decides to come after you. I wish Billy Mays was still alive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted April 14, 2010 Share Posted April 14, 2010 Granted, unfortunately two of your favorite actors die in order to ressurect Billy...who is then hit by a speeding ambulance and wounded mortally once again. BTW Bayonetta and Morrigan Aesland are both female. I wish for Keith Olbermann to not be injured by a stray projectile from a lawnmower. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totenkopf Posted April 14, 2010 Share Posted April 14, 2010 Well, I'm going to have to ruin that wish by saying no. However, b/c I know that's almost too cruel to bear, he instead spontaneously combusts on air after ranting about Bush yet again. Bad for the chimp, but msnbc gets it's best rating spike in history. I wish Barney Frank weren't stranded on an island filled with man-hating lesbian lumberjacks w/a wicked and twisted sense of humor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted April 14, 2010 Share Posted April 14, 2010 Granted, instead Barney Frank is stranded on a highway island instead with indiscriminately man hating (sexual predispositions notwithstanding) lesbian lumberjacks w/ a sick and twisted sense of humor that have access to tools and explosives. I wish Tom Anderson would get out of jail already, because while he's been gone, as a nieghbor, Beavis' daily visits to Anderson's tool shed are getting louder and more annoying and the cops won't do nothing about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greggomonkey Posted April 21, 2010 Share Posted April 21, 2010 Granted, however a nuke is dropped on the city in which they live, killing millions. I wish for a lifetime supply of beans with molasses and cheese. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hallucination Posted April 21, 2010 Share Posted April 21, 2010 Granted, but the all the cheese is moldy, and not in the way that makes it fancier. I wish for cheap space travel to become widespread by the time I wake up tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted April 21, 2010 Share Posted April 21, 2010 Granted: It's so cheap it also has a 95% mortality rate and 100% survivor debilitation rate--but hey, it's space travel and it's widespread! I wish Dr. Wily was for real all jacking cars and stuff for his robots. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hallucination Posted April 21, 2010 Share Posted April 21, 2010 Granted, but all he jacks is your car and your stuff, and doesn't let you see his robots. I wish Dr. GTA was for real jacking cars and stuff for his lasers. Granted: It's so cheap it also has a 95% mortality rate and 100% survivor debilitation rate--but hey, it's space travel and it's widespread! Totally worth it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted April 21, 2010 Share Posted April 21, 2010 Granted, and you're first, the now real Dr. Wily eventually. I wish little dogs didn't get jiggy with leather coats. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purifier Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Granted, but he got all "jiggy" while on your favorite hat.......and you didn't realize it until you put on your hat. (Your Mother says to you: Sorry son..I don't have anything that will get the yellow stains out.) I wish I had better health, from here on out. And not have to spend my freak'in time in the hospital. (Maaan, those goddamn catheters are murder). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Granted, unfortunately you tried to **** Marcellus Wallace out of the money hey loaned you so you could afford to get well. Jules Winnfield comes to your house on his behalf and executes you. You are dead. I wish Ed Schultz decided to fight Vince McMahon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alkonium Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Granted, but the winner goes after you. I wish for this wish to not be granted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted April 30, 2010 Share Posted April 30, 2010 Granted, unfortunately since it is self contradictory, you have cursed yourself so that the next thing you want to have happen doesn't. Granted, but the winner goes after you. Considering they're both big slow and old...I don't have much to worry abouyt either way. I wish that arc welder had done me in back in '02. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totenkopf Posted April 30, 2010 Share Posted April 30, 2010 He did. I wish GTA hadn't made that so easy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purifier Posted April 30, 2010 Share Posted April 30, 2010 GRANTED! But now, GTA makes it hard and you become easy, and you don't see it coming. (OH! Wait a minute..maybe..yoou doooo?) I wish women weren't so damn complicated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Avlectus Posted April 30, 2010 Share Posted April 30, 2010 Granted: now women are so boring that men decide sheep and dogs are better. Behold a campfire with the guys: Spongebob, Patrick, and Squidward (This BBCode requires its accompanying plugin to work properly.) I wish BeetleJuice would wreak havoc all over new york. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trench Posted April 30, 2010 Share Posted April 30, 2010 Granted. But he decides your hometown is next. I wish $500. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purifier Posted April 30, 2010 Share Posted April 30, 2010 Granted, but unfortunately you get $500 dollars worth of Obama socialism currency instead... ....and you end up paying it all back to Obama in unfair taxes. (Oh well....you lose some and then you lose some.) I wish a WWE DIVA or VIXEN, would layeth the smackdown on my ass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totenkopf Posted April 30, 2010 Share Posted April 30, 2010 Granted. Unfortunately, they miss this cue as your invitation to rough sex and beat the snot out of you for being a dirty perv. You have to go back to the hospital and deal w/catheters again for at least 6 months. They were just trying to "keep it simple, stupid". I wish only Obama and his cronies got paid w/that funny money, while the rest of us enjoyed the return of economic prosperity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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