The Ruin a Wish Foundation

[greggomonkey]

Granted: That locker is your own.

 

I wish that I had the power. (He man reference)

[Alkonium]

Granted, you have the power to die simply by thinking about dying.

 

I wish it was 11-11-11 already.

[Darth Avlectus]

Granted. Time skips for you. Unfortunately you miss out on some hot orgy at your place on Halloween.

 

I wish I was one of the 10 people who will get this lightsaber:

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[Totenkopf]

Granted, but you are later relieved of it and brought up on charges of possessing stolen property. Well, what did you expect when you got it from Lloyd and Harry....

 

I wish movies looked more like movies and not tv when watching them on a hi-def 1080p tv.

[Darth Avlectus]

Granted but production costs are driven up so much nobody can afford them. Your 1080i hi def TV that you paid through the nose for is now almost completely useless in the ensuing crash.

 

I wish it started raining dead animals, literally, all over north America.

[Totenkopf]

Granted, it does and you are promptly blamed and burned at the stake for modern day witchcraft. Would you like some fries with that.....

 

I wish Torettes Guy would get a new gimmick.

[Darth Avlectus]

Granted: Tourettes guy gets a new gimmick but it isn't all that different from what he did before. Unfortunately this also is at your expense.

 

I wish Tourettes Guy would come to your town next to cause trouble.

[Alkonium]

Granted, but everyone just ignores him.

 

I wish Jersey Shore was cancelled.

[Totenkopf]

Granted, but it's replaced by some abomination called The Snooky Situation and you are put to death for inflicting this on everyone.

 

I wish my own indestructible Death Star that no one else could control (nor could they control me, either).

[Hallucination]

Granted, but the only controls to fire it are local, and the shields that make it indestructible? They cause major heat issues. Don't worry though, the Death Star can handle the heat. The occupants are another story. . .

 

I wish I didn't know Totenkopf misspelled "Snooki".

[Darth Avlectus]

Granted, unfortunately you also don't care about your spelling to a point that it becomes detrimental.

 

 

I wish M. Bison from street fighter were real so I could bash his head in.

[Alkonium]

Granted, but to do so means stealing the body of Raul Julia from his grave in dressing him up in the costume. Needless to say, it does not end well.

 

I wish for fiction to be angst-free.

[Darth Avlectus]

Granted, unfortunately reality takes a turn for the worse and a little side note everyone on earth gets scabies at once.

 

I wish I could have an opportunity meet either the Jerky Boys or John Musacha.

[Totenkopf]

you do, but you're also blind.

 

I wish I hadn't answered this thread.

[Alkonium]

Granted. You don't exist.

 

I wish to pass all my exams.

[Totenkopf]

Granted, you oversleep and fail all your classes.

 

I wish no one could play Mass Effect 3 till after I did, so that there were no more spoiler issues to deal with.

[Sabretooth]

Granted, but you realise that there was nothing spoiler-worthy in the game anyway. In fact, you already knew the whole story.

 

I wish I could be good at my native language.

[Darth Avlectus]

^^^Granted you are. Unfortunately the effort required to grant your wish required I take from somewhere else, you are now homeless with horrendous credit you won't recover from until you are at least 55 years old.

 

I wish celebrity deathmatch was back, and it had all the GTA 3 era characters vs all the OT characters of SW, and Akuma from Street Fighter was the referee.

[greggomonkey]

Granted, but it is cancelled before the first episode finishes.

 

I wish I had a big knoife.

[Alkonium]

Granted, but when you brandish it, someone points out that it's actually a spoon. You've played knifey-spoony before, right?

 

I wish my spoon was too big.

[HockeyGoalie35]

Granted, but you're also a Banana

 

I wish I had a pelican.

[Hallucination]

Granted, but you're also pemmican that can feel pain. And your pelican is hungry.

 

I wish I had a car that didn't need fuel of any sort and didn't have to be insured.

[Totenkopf]

Granted. But you just realize that you outgrew Matchbox a long time ago and have used up all your wishes.

 

I wish I'd stop playing this game.

[Darth Avlectus]

Granted, unfortunately you grow bored because life just isn't as much fun and you decide to take it up again.

 

I wish California State Senator Pete Stark did something traitorous enough to warrant the death penalty and the video of his execution was death by way of woodchipper feet first while chain shackeld by his wrists to some posts cemented into the ground so that way he's stretched out in agony before the 5 ton woodchipper inches forward and munches him up slowly. (AND the poor schmuck in whose yard it is performed has to put up with the dungeon smell, unless he or she likes the smell of course--then something else.)

[Alkonium]

Granted, but the "something traitorous enough" involves you.

 

I wish TOR would go free to play.