Die Another Day Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 Okay, the other day, my doorbell rang. Not a regular thing, I can assure you. I was greeted by an old man using a walking stick, who looked very nice and started talking about the world's situation. "Great!" I think. I enjoy deep, political discussions. Yes, I am patheticly beyond help. It's after about 20 minutes of talking that I realise that I've been talking with a Jehova's Witness. As he starts his little speech about Jesus returning to Earth and sorting everyone out, destroying all war and famine, I switch off. After several well-placed smiles and nods on my part, he gives me a leaflet and leaves. Which brings me to my question: do you listen and respond to Jehova's Witnesses? Do you answer the door and tell them to shove off? Do you smile politely and give some excuse ("I'm polishing my shotgun, do you mind?")? What do you do? PS: No offence to anyone here who is religious, or who knows any Jehova's Witnesses, or is one themselves. This isn't a "Why do you hate religion?" thread, so don't insult anyone please. Keep it nice, guys! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Largo-LaGrande Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 when people come and knock on the door and go do u want a raffle ticket or somthing i just say sorry my dads not home ......so yea Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lunatic Jedi Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 Next time a Jehova's witness comes to my house, I'll just scream "penis" until they leave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Reaper Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 You should respect everyone, no matter who it is or what it does.. ... I always trow a bucket of water over them from the window above the door as soon as I see them comming to my house.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-=ReApEr=- Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 Originally posted by Death_Jedi when people come and knock on the door and go do u want a raffle ticket or somthing i just say sorry my dads not home ......so yea I always say that. Unlucky for me i got one living right next to me, who knocks on my door all the time. I just pretend i can't hear the door, with my pc headphones on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Groovy Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 You know, I never ever condemn anyone for their religious beliefs, yet I have had a run in with the Jahova's Witness in the past. Please allow me to set up the scenario... this is totally true... Anyways, I think it was during my junior or senior year in high school back in 91, or 92. It is Christmas Day, my mother is in bed, and my father is supposed to be coming home from work. Jahova's Witness stops by and starts in with the "end of the world speech". Being a Baptist, I am nice to them, and tell them that I already belong to a church and am more than prepared for the Apocalypse. I take their pamphlets and the leave. An hour later, they come back, encouraging me to attend their church, once again, I am nice, I tell them I already belong to a church, so they once again hand me yet another pamphlet, and I am hoping they do not come back, especially considering this is Christmas Day. Well, low and behold, they come back again, no less than a half hour later, and at this point, I let the doorbell ring more. I don't know why, but I immediately took off all of my clothes and answered the door stark naked. I tell them: "I am taking a shower, what do you want now?" At this point they make a mad dash for the car and never return. It was a sick tactic, but it worked. I don't know about you guys, but anyone who is too forcefull, immediately turns me off, and nobody who lived in my house at the time, was angry at me for what I did. We never heard from them again.....ever! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ckcsaber Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 Originally posted by Darth Groovy It is Christmas Day, my mother is in bed, and my father is supposed to be coming home from work. Jahova's Witness stops by and starts in with the "end of the world speech". Being a Baptist, I am nice to them, and tell them that I already belong to a church and am more than prepared for the Apocalypse. I take their pamphlets and the leave. An hour later, they come back, encouraging me to attend their church, once again, I am nice, I tell them I already belong to a church, so they once again hand me yet another pamphlet, and I am hoping they do not come back, especially considering this is Christmas Day. Well, low and behold, they come back again, no less than a half hour later, and at this point, I let the doorbell ring more. I don't know why, but I immediately took off all of my clothes and answered the door stark naked. I tell them: "I am taking a shower, what do you want now?" At this point they make a mad dash for the car and never return. It was a sick tactic, but it worked. I don't know about you guys, but anyone who is too forcefull, immediately turns me off, and nobody who lived in my house at the time, was angry at me for what I did. Good one! I have never had any "run in's" with a Jehova's Witness, and I don't know much about their religion. It seems to me that they are just another minority religion, and this is no reason to dislike them. If they did knock on my door, I'd ask them if they wanted to join MY religion. lol, that should get rid of them, but not nearly as effective as Groovy's "answerthedoornaked" technique. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C'jais Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 It'd be easier for them if they didn't try so hard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-=ReApEr=- Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 Originally posted by Darth Groovy You know, I never ever condemn anyone for their religious beliefs, yet I have had a run in with the Jahova's Witness in the past. Please allow me to set up the scenario... this is totally true... Anyways, I think it was during my junior or senior year in high school back in 91, or 92. It is Christmas Day, my mother is in bed, and my father is supposed to be coming home from work. Jahova's Witness stops by and starts in with the "end of the world speech". Being a Baptist, I am nice to them, and tell them that I already belong to a church and am more than prepared for the Apocalypse. I take their pamphlets and the leave. An hour later, they come back, encouraging me to attend their church, once again, I am nice, I tell them I already belong to a church, so they once again hand me yet another pamphlet, and I am hoping they do not come back, especially considering this is Christmas Day. Well, low and behold, they come back again, no less than a half hour later, and at this point, I let the doorbell ring more. I don't know why, but I immediately took off all of my clothes and answered the door stark naked. I tell them: "I am taking a shower, what do you want now?" At this point they make a mad dash for the car and never return. It was a sick tactic, but it worked. I don't know about you guys, but anyone who is too forcefull, immediately turns me off, and nobody who lived in my house at the time, was angry at me for what I did. We never heard from them again.....ever! Nice one, i wouldn't go that far. But it depends, if they kept bugging you then why not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
•-BLaCKouT-• Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 I'm usually too busy hacking people up online to get up and answer the door, so my girlfriend gets it and then comes through, giving it "bloody Jehova's Wintnesses again!" I'd love to spend five minutes asking them some questions! Like a mate at work says his Uncle is a JW. He doesn't really know much more about it but says his uncle gets Easter off work. I thought they didn't believe that Christ was born in the first place? How can they justify taking time off work to mark his death? There may of course be an explanation for this, but that's why I want to talk to them. Groovy's post reminds me of a Top-Tip I read once in Viz: Convince house-callers you are insane by answering the door naked, eating s**t out of an ice-cream container with the words HELP ME carved into your chest. Watch them laugh as you reveal it was only a joke Other than the above, I'm prepared to let them get on with whatever they want to do; so long as they don't bother me too much. We all know there are far more 'evil' ways to express one's devotion to a religion than knocking on people's doors. That's more irritating really Peace, B. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acrylic Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 Well, at my sisters once, there were Jahova's Witnesses....And we ignored them, didnt answer the door. But, if the thing that happened to Groovy, happened to me, I'd scream at them and I'd say GET OUTTA MY [self removed] NEIGHBORHOOD!!!!!!!!! Or something along the lines of that, since I'm just 14 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue15 Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 I just tell them that I'm God. j/k never really had to deal w/JHs and i hope i never do, I believe that christ died for my sins, so if they bring on the 'you'll go to hell' speech i can just say 'let god be the judge of that' and close the door. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Datheus Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 I find Christians (IE, Catholicism, Prodestant, etc) to be just about as pushy as Jehova Witnesses. Now, I've never had a confrontation with a Jehova, from what it sounds like, it's a lot like my confrontations with Christians. Now, while most Christians don't go door to door, when I infer that I don't believe in "God", that's when it gets heavy. Sometimes I wonder if they really "care", or if they get a sales commision for converting us... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue15 Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 hmmmm i'm a christian, i don't go around like a moron, trying to convert people... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thrackan Solo Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 Just to clarify, Jehova's Witness is not part of Christianity. One day, I was home alone, there was a knock at the door. A guy that looked like Hugo Weaving was standing there, started talking about something. I said no thank you, and proceeded to close the door, but he stuck his foot in between the door...I almost wet myself, made my peace with God, then he nonchalantly said,"Have a brochure." then left. Scared the Bejesus out of me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C'jais Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 Originally posted by Thrackan Solo Just to clarify, Jehova's Witness is not part of Christianity. They are. And so are Catholics, Mormons, Baptists and the KKK. One day, I was home alone, there was a knock at the door. A guy that looked like Hugo Weaving was standing there, started talking about something. I said no thank you, and proceeded to close the door, but he stuck his foot in between the door...I almost wet myself, made my peace with God, then he nonchalantly said,"Have a brochure." then left. Scared the Bejesus out of me. That's when you should have taken his brochure and stuffed it in his mouth until he god-darned begged for mercy. I'd probably have kicked the guy in the nuts, though, no need to be excessively violent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kain Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 Well, I get hassled by Christians of all sorts...mostly JW. Me and a friend seen them coming one day. They knocked on the door. I opened it. They smiled. I raised an eyebrow before screaming 'THE DAMN DICE ARE BACK IN THE WINE GLASS WITH THE POLAR BEAR SINGING ABOUT THE WAX OF THE OIL COOKIES THAT THE DANCING ELVES DROPPED ON THE DOG!!!'. The left. We laughed. I locked the door. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thrackan Solo Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 I hate it when other christians hassle people at there homes, no wonder why most people dont like us christians. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Count Posted May 18, 2003 Share Posted May 18, 2003 Evil or Nice No pointless YES Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lunatic Jedi Posted May 19, 2003 Share Posted May 19, 2003 Originally posted by MydnightPsion Me and a friend seen them coming one day. They knocked on the door. I opened it. They smiled. I raised an eyebrow before screaming 'THE DAMN DICE ARE BACK IN THE WINE GLASS WITH THE POLAR BEAR SINGING ABOUT THE WAX OF THE OIL COOKIES THAT THE DANCING ELVES DROPPED ON THE DOG!!!'. The left. We laughed. I locked the door. Hmm... that sounds effective... *Writes it down* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pink Monkey Posted May 19, 2003 Share Posted May 19, 2003 This is how I deal with Jehovah's Witnesses... ES: Yes? JW: Good morning, sir. We'd like to visit with you, and discuss our lord's mission on earth if you don't mind. ES: Ahum, yes. Please make yourselves at home. I don't use furniture, but the meat hooks are comfy. JW: Oh. Oh-kay...well, sir, have you ever read the Bible? ES: My copy is illegible. I keep using pages from it to roll joints. JW: Oh. Well, please accept this copy as a--HEY! You aren't supposed to eat it! ES: Mmmm, but it smells of fresh primate. I so love primate. If you fellows are here later, perhaps you'd care to join me for a barbecue.... JW: AAAIIIIIEEEE-EEEEEE! *CRASH! run-run-run-run* I haven't seen one on my street since. vlr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZBomber Posted May 19, 2003 Share Posted May 19, 2003 Mmm.. They can be rather annoying, but I haven't done anything worth sharing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Sitherino Posted May 19, 2003 Share Posted May 19, 2003 tell them your busy having sex;) trust me they'll go away(especially if your a teenager) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
munik Posted May 19, 2003 Share Posted May 19, 2003 I just tell them I'm not interested. I get a couple of them at the door every few months. No big deal. I'm not a big fan of lying, and I'm not afraid of confrontation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ET Warrior Posted May 19, 2003 Share Posted May 19, 2003 Originally posted by InsaneSith tell them your busy having sex;) trust me they'll go away(especially if your a teenager) "could you guys come back later? Me and my girlfriend are having a little.........ya know......" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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