JediKnight707 Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 http://www.ebaumsworld.com/starwarsprank.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 loved the Jar Jar impersonation Ok, its not exactly funny: but i'll ask you guys a series of questions: 1) How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woogiee Posted July 27, 2006 Share Posted July 27, 2006 Worf Learns the Truth Saw Some Wookiees Funny Interpretation of a Song in a Language I Dont Recognize Shame On Picard Jack and Jean-Luc Watch Futurama Riker Has No Class I find these stupid things hilarius Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
St. Jimmy Posted July 27, 2006 Share Posted July 27, 2006 loved the Jar Jar impersonation Ok, its not exactly funny: but i'll ask you guys a series of questions: 1) How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Ask him. either that or use a chainsaw... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted July 27, 2006 Share Posted July 27, 2006 naw, just open the door, shove the giraffe in, shut the door next Q: How do you put an elephant in a fridge? BTW: the questions i'm asking at vaguely related or connected, so do a little thinking before you answer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milo Posted August 15, 2006 Share Posted August 15, 2006 LOL. No doubt the dumbest toy I've ever seen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted August 15, 2006 Author Share Posted August 15, 2006 SCENARIO: You are on a horse galloping at a constant speed. On your right is a sharp drop off On your left is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you. Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo and YOUR horse is unable to overtake it. Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you. What must you do to safely get out of this dangerous situation? Get off the Merry-go-round! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeff Posted August 15, 2006 Share Posted August 15, 2006 ahah, that is great Chainz I had no idea before I read the spoiler Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raven_Onasi Posted August 16, 2006 Share Posted August 16, 2006 Good one Chainz! LOL!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RevanA4 Posted August 16, 2006 Share Posted August 16, 2006 Kenshin outtakes http://youtube.com/watch?v=SfkHAyymQ5w Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jae Onasi Posted August 20, 2006 Share Posted August 20, 2006 At dinner last night, I was telling Jimbo about a comment a beta-reader made on my story about an inconsistency she caught. She pointed out 'how does your character know why the enemy doesn't notice her? Maybe he's in the back of the ship taking a pee.' While I was chuckling about that, my son piped up sagely, "Mom, they don't pee in Star Wars." Trust a 9 year old to notice the bathroom habits of Star Wars characters.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raven_Onasi Posted August 21, 2006 Share Posted August 21, 2006 ^^^Not to mention he's a boy, my brothers notice stuff like that too. It's quite funny, LOL!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MachineCult Posted August 21, 2006 Share Posted August 21, 2006 Riker Has No Class I recognise that music where is it from? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commander Obi-Wan Posted August 23, 2006 Share Posted August 23, 2006 Austrian robber mistakes town hall for a bank. There are some more bizarre articles below that one. Also, I read in the paper yesterday that a woman, in Kolkata, India, has to wed a man at least 70 years of age, before remarrying her husband. Since, she divorced him while she was drunk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MachineCult Posted August 23, 2006 Share Posted August 23, 2006 Lol, Commander Obi-Wan, it's Austria not Australia. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace MacLeod Posted August 24, 2006 Share Posted August 24, 2006 Once upon a time, there was a handsome, strapping young lad named Stevereeno. Stevereeno lived on a farm in the country his entire life, and filled his happy days with handsome, strapping young lad farmwork. One day, when he was busy working and sweating in the hot sun, a beautiful girl in the next field over caught his eye. She was Jenny, the wholesome and blossoming daughter of the farmer next door. She looked up, and Stevereeno caught her eye as well. They hurried over to each other, and after returning each others' eyes to their respective sockets and viewing each other in fully stereoscopic vision, instantly became smitten. A whirlwind romance ensued, and it wasn't long before Stevereeno asked Jenny to marry him. On the day of the wedding, Stevereeno stood, handsome and strapping as ever in his best suit at the altar in front of the priest. His cousin Hank stood beside him as Best Man. Steve, unable to contain his nervousness, whispered over to Hank: "Buddy...I...gotta ask you something!" "What is it?" Hank replied. "You gotta...you gotta tell me what to do in bed! I...I'm a virgin! I don't know how to do nuthin!" Stevereeno choked out. "...You gotta be kiddin' me, cuz! You grew up on a farm! Just do what the dogs do!" Just then, "Here Comes The Bride" blared out over the pipe organ. Jenny, looking more radiant and beautiful than ever, came sweeping down the aisle, her brilliant white dress almost blinding the dearly beloved. Stevereeno took a deep breath and muttered "what the dogs do...what the dogs do..." under his breath a few times before the ceremony began. A few minutes later, Steve and Jenny were Husband and Wife. They hopped into Stevereeno's truck, and drove off to their honeymoon. The next morning, Jenny came crashing through the front door of her family's farmhouse, carrying all her baggage and crying profusely. She was so distraught that her mother and sisters took 10 whole minutes to calm her down. "Oh, mama! I can't possibly be married to that man! It's horrible! He doesn't know how to make love at all! He just keeps smelling my ass and pissing on the bedpost!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milo Posted September 1, 2006 Share Posted September 1, 2006 Hehe, found this one in another forum. A woman posted the following personal: HUSBAND WANTED: MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's), MUST NOT BEAT ME, MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME, AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED! ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON. On the second day she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a grey-haired gentleman sitting in a wheel chair. He had no arms or legs. "You're not really asking me to consider you, are you?!" The widow said. "Just look at you ... You have no legs!" The old gentleman smiled, "Therefore, I cannot run around on you!" "You don't have any arms either!" she snorted. Again, the old man smiled, "Therefore, I can never beat you!" She raised an eyebrow and asked intently, "Are you still good in bed??" The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said, "I rang the door bell, didn't I?" The wedding is scheduled for this Saturday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted May 9, 2007 Author Share Posted May 9, 2007 The Inbox Of Nardo Pace, The Empire's Worst Engineer ------------------------------------- Subject Trash Compactor From Death Star Detention Level Janitor <oldroscoe@empiremail.com> Date A Long Time Ago 7:46 PM To Nardo Pace <npace@empiremail.com> Hey, kid. That trash compactor you designed is up and running and I've got to say it looks great. Lots of grime, a magnetically sealed hatch that can't be opened from the inside, a tentacled garbage creature that practically serves no purpose at all. It's got everything a salty old janitor could ever want. One thing, though. It takes an awful long time to flatten garbage. I'm talking a minute or more, depending on how many flimsy poles I toss in there. If our capital ships can boogie at faster than light speeds, why can't we make a few walls slide toward one another at a speed that outpaces a Hutt's leisurely stroll? ------------------------------------- Subject breathing device too ****in LOUD From Lord Vader <xVaDeRx@empiremail.com> Date A Long Time Ago 12:20 AM To Nardo Pace <npace@empiremail.com> yo hey i still dont understand whats going on with this thing can u put a knob on my breather apperatis so i can turn down the volume when im in the library or sneakin up on maintenence droids? why did u put a speaker on this thing in the first place lol ------------------------------------- Subject E-11 Blaster Rifle Calibration Still Off From Stormtrooper Commander 09731 <09731@empiremail.com> Date A Long Time Ago 3:51 PM To Nardo Pace <npace@empiremail.com> As you know, the E-11 has come a long way since its initial prototype. Thanks to your hard work over the past three years the rifle no longer fires completely sideways, and with your latest revision, the number of casualties resulting from blaster fire being directed completely backwards has been drastically reduced. That said, the E-11 still has some accuracy issues. We recently bolted one of the rifles to a testing mechanism so that it couldn't move even a millimeter, then set up a human-sized target six feet in front of the blaster's barrel. Shooting in two second intervals, we let the E-11 fire at the target continuously for three days. The result? Not one shot hit the target. I realize you're busy, but perhaps we can go over the design one more time and iron this out. ------------------------------------- Subject Death Star From Foreman Galhi <fgalhi@empiremail.com> Date A Long Time Ago 8:13 PM To Nardo Pace <npace@empiremail.com> Keep your chin up, ok? Don't let the whole "Death Star getting blown up" thing get you down. It's really my fault just as much as it is yours. Your original plan called for three weak spots, and I asked you to cut it down to one. If I had suggested we get rid of the weak spots altogether none of this would have happened. What do we do now? Mope? No. We learn from our mistakes and make an adjustment to the blueprint for the new Death Star I'm working on. Construction is going great, by the way. As you suggested, instead of constructing a defensive shell around the framework then working my way inward, I'm just building all the cool stuff in the middle first. I think you're right, it's the best way to go. ------------------------------------- Subject AT-ATs... hell yeah! From Maximilian Veers <mveers@empiremail.com> Date A Long Time Ago 10:09 AM To Nardo Pace <npace@empiremail.com> WOOO! Are you kidding me? Are you freaking kidding me!? These AT-ATs rule! I cannot believe how awesome they are. I'm personally piloting one on our upcoming operation on Hoth and I can't wait to stomp on those rebel scum. There's like, no way to stop these things. I'm a big fan of yours, man. Big fan. ------------------------------------- Subject carbonite transport device From Boba Fett <backpacksgotjets@bountyhunters.com> Date A Long Time Ago 3:17 PM To Nardo Pace <npace@empiremail.com> I am currently transporting a bounty that has been frozen in carbonite with a device you created. I have been told to direct any questions or comments I might have your way. This is obviously a new technology, but might I suggest adding a few security measures to the transport device's control panel? Right now anyone can walk up to this thing and flip a few switches to release the frozen prisoner. I'm thinking a number pad with a secret code would be great, or heck, even a plain old key. Just a friendly suggestion. Oh, and thanks for the modifications you made to my rocket pack. That "ignition" button square on the back of the pack where I can't reach it is great. ------------------------------------- Subject This darn bottomless shaft in my room From Emperor Palpatine <bigbossman@empiremail.com> Date A Long Time Ago 1:42 AM To Nardo Pace <npace@empiremail.com> You are responsible for designing my Throne Room, yes? Do not doubt it. I can see the truth inside you. It burns with a twisted blackness that cannot be denied. I ask you this: Why is there a chasm in my room? Was it really necessary? What purpose does it serve? Nothing useful has ever come of it. In fact, sometimes when I awake in the middle of the night and stumble in the darkness while making my way to the Imperial Restroom, I mistakenly wobble along the shaft's edge. I also bump my knee on the Imperial Coffee Table, but that is another matter. I'm expecting very important company today, but I fully expect that you will draw up plans for a grate to cover this errant hole and have someone build it tomorrow. It is your destiny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jae Onasi Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 Oh, and thanks for the modifications you made to my rocket pack. That "ignition" button square on the back of the pack where I can't reach it is great. That and the blasters that never hit their target (thank God the backwards firing got fixed) had me howling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davinq Posted May 11, 2007 Share Posted May 11, 2007 Dear ol' Palpy's bumping his knees on the Imperial Coffee Table? That must be really good for his arthritis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted May 31, 2007 Author Share Posted May 31, 2007 "Without an 'About Me' section, I've lost all sense of self," said Imbrescia, 17, who depends on the site to convey his innermost thoughts to millions of extended-network friends. "Do I want kids? How tall am I? What's my body type? These are questions I can't answer anymore. I'd pray to a god for help, but I've lost my religion field." the ONION. Gotta love it http://www.theonion.com/content/news/myspace_outage_leaves_millions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dagobahn Eagle Posted June 1, 2007 Share Posted June 1, 2007 Construction is going great, by the way. As you suggested, instead of constructing a defensive shell around the framework then working my way inward, I'm just building all the cool stuff in the middle first. I think you're right, it's the best way to go. That. Was. So. Out of Order. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted June 6, 2007 Author Share Posted June 6, 2007 Misheard Lyrics Guy MISHEARD LYRICS - Pearl Jam - Yellow Ledbetter His other entries are hilarious as well, but Eddie Vedder is a prime candidate for such satire Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Windu Posted June 6, 2007 Share Posted June 6, 2007 Heh. some of these are pretty funny. @Chainz: I notice your location. Do you go to UTK perchance? My response below ~ Cz Heh. some of these are pretty funny. @Chainz: I notice your location. Do you go to UTK perchance? "Did" for about 3 years, and was still taking "electives" Transferred to ITT Tech and gained a BS in Electronics Engineering in the same amount of time (wished I had gone straight to ITT).. It's been awhile however since I've had to 'hit the books'. (read : old fart) One of my sisters goes to UTK and the other one goes to UTC. They've both just started so they're in for a "hoot".. hehehe Go Vols! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted August 16, 2007 Author Share Posted August 16, 2007 Hmmm... I'm seeing a trend... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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