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advice on females by females


RevanA4

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So any advice on how to tell here or just comments that will put my mind at ease will be very appreciated.

 

Well, since I was just in this same situation, I have some first-hand advice. Tell her. Be specific. Tell her that you've been friends for 3 years, and you love being her friend, but you think a relationship would be even more fantastic.

 

Then she has to acknowledge it. If she says she just wants to be friends that's what it's gotta be.

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Well, since I was just in this same situation, I have some first-hand advice. Tell her. Be specific. Tell her that you've been friends for 3 years, and you love being her friend, but you think a relationship would be even more fantastic.

 

Then she has to acknowledge it. If she says she just wants to be friends that's what it's gotta be.

 

But the problem with this is that if she says no, this will always be in the back of her mind when you meet up afterwards and the the friendship is never going to be the same again. The question is whether losing the friendship is worth the risk - I mean if you genuinely cherish her friendship then it might not be, but if you see your friendship as just a stepping stone to something else then you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

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But the problem with this is that if she says no, this will always be in the back of her mind when you meet up afterwards and the the friendship is never going to be the same again. The question is whether losing the friendship is worth the risk -

Completely untrue. It can vary from girl to girl but the only time before where I ventured a try with a friend and she rejected it, nothing changed in our friendship. It actually made the friendship better, because I was content being friends and no longer wanted a relationship out of it. YOU are making assumptions that things will change, when that is not necessarily so.

 

Hey I have an idea that is diffcult to pull off but it'll work. Make yourself irresistible and she'll come for you. Why do you have to do all the asking her out?
Because a lot of girls like tradition, and tradition dictates that it is the man's responsibility to make the first move. I'm really curious how one goes about making oneself "irresistable". cover yourself in chocolate and flowers?

 

Guys just need to stop wishing the girls would do the asking out. They probably won't, and you've just got to nut up and do it.

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Completely untrue. It can vary from girl to girl but the only time before where I ventured a try with a friend and she rejected it, nothing changed in our friendship. It actually made the friendship better, because I was content being friends and no longer wanted a relationship out of it. YOU are making assumptions that things will change, when that is not necessarily so.

 

thanks ET that puts my worries at ease

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thanks ET that puts my worries at ease

Just to add to it, my 'ex' and I were good friends for about 3 years before our relationship.. and then that lasted for another 3 years :)

 

We 'broke up' mutually about a year ago, but we're still very close. Actually, to be honest, she just left my apartment about an hour ago. (granted breaking up on good terms would better your chances on friendship afterwards... better yet.. don't break up hehe)...

 

Just because a relationship becomes closer doesn't automatically "doom" it if things don't last :)

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*smacks chainz.2da for not saying this earlier*

 

dude why didn't ya speak up :confused: when I asked for advice that was the kind of statement i was looking for.

 

but hey at least ya said it now

well...I did post some advice in your first edition of the thread that was deemed "sound advice" by a female ;)

 

Might want to go back and check it out as well :xp: hehehe...

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I was joking about the making yourself irresistable , but now i have a vision of myself covered in chocolate and flowers. But then everyone in the street will be saying 'Oh my, your hair is so delicious, wanna go out?'
Not to mention you smell like roses.

 

Of course...if they do date you...and eat all of the chocolate off...they'll be 20 pounds heavier and you might not want to date THEM anymore!

 

:xp:

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Looks are completely irrelevent. It's a person's MIND, not their body, that counts.

And you are a complete liar. Looks are relevant. To some they are the most relevant, which is stupid, but to EVERYONE they have importance. You canNOT have a real relationship with someone who you are not attracted to physically. It just won't work.

 

I was, of course, making a joke, but your statement is completely fallacious.

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^^^^

agreed. i have some very good female friends that have fantasticly interesting personalities and similar interests, but if there is one thing that keeps me from dating a couple of them is how they look. for clarification purposes: they're not despicably hideous, and i do not view them in such a manner. its just that their looks just don't agree with my liking too well.

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It sucks, but looks are important. Sure, we all want to say " I look at a persons mind, I really don't care what they look like," but thats just not how it is.

 

It's one thing when your talking about friendship, but part of romance is physical attraction. I doubt anyone, in the heat of passion, has ever yelled out "I love your mind." At least, not unless they mean how dirty it is.

 

I have a another statement I really want to add, but I'm just not that mean.

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Looks are important, despite the fact that we're bombarded with how we "should" look by the media and such, we wouldn't have this need to find someone attractive in the first place if there wasn't some sort of drive that told us to look for certain "ideal" elements in a mate.

 

I mean, if you thought of it in its basic terms or reproduction and set aside of the "poetry" of it all.

 

XD lol

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