Emperor Devon Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Thread split from Congratulations stoffe -mkb- and Jae Onasi! thread. I included tk102 in this, too. Not the original topic. Whatev. The attempt to box the ears won't work. The knife strikes block it, Grasshopper. I'd wager I'm a lot faster than you. Being a lot younger. Uh-huh. I've been working on my character some more for the duel. We'll see who falls over laughing. *Devon giggles insanely* Oh, I so want to reply to that, but I'll just bite my tongue and giggle at the image you've just created instead.... We're thinking about different different images. Mine was just plain sick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jae Onasi Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 I'd wager I'm a lot faster than you. Being a lot younger. Try it. Go ahead. Make my day. I've sparred with guys half my age. And beaten them. Soundly. I've held my own against a male red-belt 15 years younger who competed avidly in gymnastics at the NCAA/college level and is extremely limber and very fast with his kicks. Speed at walking or running does not translate into speed in martial arts at all. Unless you're a red/brown belt or above in a martial art, I can pretty much guarantee that first I'll block your pitiful attempt to punch or kick, which will have no power or control because you won't have the proper stance or technique to throw one with max effectiveness. Not to mention you'll telegraph which part of the body you're going to move, because you haven't learned how not to do that through several years of sparring training, and I'll see it coming a mile away and will be prepared just fine for it. Then you'll find yourself lying on the ground wondering how someone twice your age could give you a kick you never saw squarely planted so hard to the abdomen that it knocked you off your feet, even with the chest protector on. Then you'll thank me for not missing low with that kick and not kicking you in the head and giving you a concussion. The only ones I haven't beaten or come to a draw at all are the guys and gals who outrank me as blackbelts, but they've each also been doing it for 10-15 years (and have all competed at the national level and gotten gold medals), and I've only done TKD for 4. I'm not embarrassed in the least to say I've lost to them, because it took a lot of guts just to step into the sparring ring with them in the first place. They are intimidatingly excellent. I've put guys half my age and taller than me by a foot on the mat anytime I teach self-defense techniques--it is very easy with the correct technique. My master is 53. There's no way I can whip his butt--he just knows too much about martial arts and fighting, and experience/good technique outranks age as _the_ determining factors in a sparring match. So, by all means, come on over and try it. I'd be delighted to provide you with an object lesson on youth vs. experience in the martial arts. I'll promise to leave your teeth intact. We're thinking about different different images. Mine was just plain sick. Uh, so was mine. Of course, you had to fish me up to gutter level to find it first. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emperor Devon Posted January 8, 2007 Author Share Posted January 8, 2007 Try it. Go ahead. Make me day. That would be 'make my day', Jae. Let's practice a few times, and you'll soon learn to say it normally. I've sparred with guys half my age. And beaten them. Soundly. {lots of bragging } Didn't you mention asthma a few times? If I prolong the fight, winning should be an even simpler matter. The only ones I haven't beaten or come to a draw at all are the guys and gals who outrank me as blackbelts, but they've each also been doing it for 10-15 years (and have all competed at the national level and gotten gold medals), and I've only done TKD for 4. I'm not embarrassed in the least to say I've lost to them, because it took a lot of guts just to step into the sparring ring with them in the first place. They are intimidatingly excellent. See? For all you know, I could be a black belt! and experience/good technique outranks age as _the_ determining factors in a sparring match. There are other factors, too. So, by all means, come on over and try it. I'd be delighted to provide you with an object lesson on youth vs. experience in the martial arts. I'll promise to leave your teeth intact. Sign a waiver absolving me of any injuries you might receive, and I'd be happy to. Uh, so was mine. Of course, you had to fish me up to gutter level to find it first. Up, she says? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediMaster12 Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 ED: You are just asking for trouble. I have seen ladies that are Jae's respectable age take down a youngster like you. Please don't carry on the male is stronger than female complex because to tell you the truth that just screams of a little man who has confidence issues. I didn't know about tk 102 so congrats too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Kitty Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 I would just like to state for the record that you people are all crazy (you know who you are) Of course, not that such observations don't include myself as well, but hey. Also, Kitty has a new rule. Might be a little late for new year's resolutions but somehow it seemed wise --Sake is for sipping. Finally, I'd like to reccomend that you go and watch some old Kung Fu Theatre style films ED. There's a really good reason why everybody in all the movies are always terrified of the little 80 year old guys, not to mention why the few who choose to forget that sane and healthy fear/respect usually get used as dust mops to wipe up the floor. Youth and vigor are great, sure.. But I'll bank with experience and knowledge almost every time. Especially when those you're comparing aren't actually even old yet. Though hey... If you still insist on getting schooled, just let me know when so I can get a front row seat for the event. -Kitt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jae Onasi Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 I would just like to state for the record that you people are all crazy (you know who you are) Welcome to the Hotel Asylum. We have lots of pretty, pretty Orlando Blooms that we call very good friends. Also, Kitty has a new rule. Might be a little late for new year's resolutions but somehow it seemed wise --Sake is for sipping. That bad, eh? Drink lots of water! Get some sleep! Youth and vigor are great, sure.. But I'll bank with experience and knowledge almost every time. Especially when those you're comparing aren't actually even old yet. Though hey... If you still insist on getting schooled, just let me know when so I can get a front row seat for the event. Heh, it'd be a very short sparring session. @ED--the asthma won't be a problem because I control it carefully and take an inhaler before exercise. That and we'll only be sparring oh, maybe 15 seconds. Thanks everyone. I'll try to be good. I'm not sure what it is I'll be good at, mind you, but it'll be something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emperor Devon Posted January 11, 2007 Author Share Posted January 11, 2007 Welcome to the Hotel Asylum. We have lots of pretty, pretty Orlando Blooms that we call very good friends. You love quoting our poem. I better post the whole thing now. Hotel Asylum (Done by Jae and Devon, some parts obviously by her. ) On a dark desert planet, sandstorms in my face, Uncle Ben says he needs me, can't get outta this place. Up ahead in the distance, I saw a saber of light My head grew fuzzy and my sight grew dim Then I stopped in fright There she stood in the doorway; I heard the lockdown bell And I was thinking to myself, ’she thinks it's heaven, but I know it's hell’ Then she chained the door and she showed me the way There were voices in the sewers, I thought I heard them say... Welcome to the hotel asylum Such a lovely place We have a 40-year face Plenty of rooms at the hotel asylum Any time of year, JM'll be committed here Her mind is truly twisted, lots of crazies she tends She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, that she calls "VERY good friends" They're catatonic at the computers, sweet Orlando sweat. Some play Kotor to remember, she wants her hubby to forget So I called up the fruitcake, ’please bring me my clozapine’ She said, ’we've had that drug here since nineteen eighty nine’ And still Devon's darkside is calling from far away, Wake you up in the middle of the night Just to hear them say... Welcome to the hotel asylum Such a lovely place We have a 40-year face They're livin’ it up at the hotel asylum What a nice surprise, we've got lots of guys girls Cushions on the ceiling, Pink thorazine on ice And she said ’we are all just lunatics here, of my own device’ And in RJM’s sewer, We went to view that beast His mind was miles in the gutter, Far away from me at least Last thing I remember, I was Running for the door I had to find the passage back To the sanity I had before ’relax,’ said the fruitcake, We are programmed to receive. You can checkout any time you like, But you'll never truly leave! I should go post this in the CEC. @ED--the asthma won't be a problem because I control it carefully and take an inhaler before exercise. That and we'll only be sparring oh, maybe 15 seconds. Devon's flawless Jae-pwning strategy: (1. In the unlikely event regular force is not enough, follow the next few steps: (2. Run (3. Continue until Jae is exhausted and can hardly raise a hand (it is quite likely here that the younger person without asthma will be able to handle running for a longer amount of time) (4. PWN her at your leisure! (5. Come back to LF and gloat Youth and vigor are great, sure.. But I'll bank with experience and knowledge almost every time. Especially when those you're comparing aren't actually even old yet. Jae's about twice my age. I'd venture I have the energy and stamina to take her out, or at least use the above strategy to do so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Kitty Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 Jae's about twice my age. I'd venture I have the energy and stamina to take her out, or at least use the above strategy to do so. That is a very silly (not to mention dangerous assumption). My daddy was exactly twice my age when I was 20, and he would have still handed me my arse then (just as he would now) were I to try to take him on. He's just turned 56 now btw, and can still run several miles with ease. Age is simply not a factor by itself. Where it becomes important is when someone can no longer stay in shape, which has no set number. I know people in their teens who'd weeze and gasp if they tried to sprint 100 yards, and conversely I know people in their 50s and 60s who jog 3 or 4 miles a day and can still bench press more than their own weight. Never make assumptions, and the fastest way to loose is to under estimate your opponent. -Kitt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jae Onasi Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 Hotel Asylum (Done by Jae and Devon, some parts obviously by her. ) (snipped) I should go post this in the CEC. Heh, it'll be very amusing. Yes, you should post it. Jimbo did the first verse, btw. Devon's flawless Jae-pwning strategy: (1. In the unlikely event regular force is not enough, follow the next few steps: (2. Run (3. Continue until Jae is exhausted and can hardly raise a hand (it is quite likely here that the younger person without asthma will be able to handle running for a longer amount of time) (4. PWN her at your leisure! (5. Come back to LF and gloat Uh, you can't step out of the ring without losing a point, at least in TKD. And I'm not stupid enough to go running after you to fight. I'll just wait til you get back. If you want to do the Brave Sir Robin thing, however, go ahead. Jae's about twice my age. I'd venture I have the energy and stamina to take her out, or at least use the above strategy to do so. Doesn't matter if you're a 85 year old 5 foot tall little old lady. If you have good technique, you're going to beat an opponent a foot taller and 100 lbs heavier who doesn't have good technique. And I may split off this part of the thread into a martial arts thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Astrotoy7 Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 damnit! this thread is too light hearted I like 'Martial Arts' threads like this that turn into flambeaux with internet Bruce Lee wannabees talking about how their style > your form. btw, my master is better than your master. mtfbwya Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vaelastraz Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 How come noone posted a smart Chuck Norris joke so far? Anyway, in case Jae gets to duel Devon, 100$ on Jae. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediMaster12 Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 Hey, no betting here unless its DS points or cool points or even some of RJM highly prized Mojo points. Personally I would just pop the popcorn and sit back and watch the queen, the goddess, my inspiration aka Jae kick Little Man's, aka ED, butt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MTV2 Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 whats the relation between Jae and ED anyways? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
REDJOHNNYMIKE Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 Who is your master anyway Jae, maybe I've fought him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hallucination Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Hey, no betting here unless its DS points or cool points or even some of RJM highly prized Mojo points. Personally I would just pop the popcorn and sit back and watch the queen, the goddess, my inspiration aka Jae kick Little Man's, aka ED, butt. I'm 100% sure cool points (of the hallucinagenic variety) are BOP. I am fully aware of the fact I misspelled 'hallucinogenic'. While youth and condition are important (the latter more so than the former) in a fight, skill and experience beat them nine times out of ten. I feel it is my duty, as someone who has done some fighting, to warn ED that mothers are hell in a fight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emperor Devon Posted January 12, 2007 Author Share Posted January 12, 2007 I think everyone's misinterpreted my posts (and the name given to this thread). My point isn't that youth always wins over experience - just that I would win against Jae. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediMaster12 Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 I'm telling you ED is suffering from delusions of grandeur and confidence issues. Experience usually wins and if I had any points I'd lay 'em on Jae, the queen, the goddess, my inspiration. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jae Onasi Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 @Astro--my master has won nat'l championships. I bet he pwns your master. I never argue about which martial arts is better. Different ones meet different people's needs. I always loved the show Kung Fu myself. And Jackie Chan is very fun. Didn't Bruce Lee use trampolines and wires and such for his movies? Chuck Norris would have whooped up on him. @RJM--he's up in WI--I don't think he's made it down your way as far as I know. @ED--if you'd had any kind of martial arts, I suspect you would have mentioned it by now. @MTV2--Emperor Devon and I are friendly nemesi. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Det. Bart Lasiter Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 I've taken Aikido, Karate, and Chinese Boxing. Dunno which one I like best. I'd love to get better at kenjuutsu though, maybe get a nodachi. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedHawke Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 @Astro--my master has won nat'l championships. I bet he pwns your master. Chuck Norris would pwn all your masters! Seriously though I would pwn all your styles for I am the Master of the Flying Guillotine! Note to self: Stop watching so much late night Cinemax... @ Jae, nope FWIU Bruice Lee didn't use any special gear in his movies, that was all Bruce. Also if I recall correctly Bruce Lee instructed Chuck Norris at one point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jae Onasi Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 I've taken Aikido, Karate, and Chinese Boxing. Dunno which one I like best. I'd love to get better at kenjuutsu though, maybe get a nodachi. I'd like to try Kendo myself, but there's no dojo within a reasonable driving distance. I'll probably have to switch to Tai Chi at some point because tkd's really hard on a knee that's got pretty much no cartilage left. Switching from tkd would suck--I've finally gotten my forms to the level where I'd have a good shot of winning/placing in the state championship, which would mean a shot at nationals, but that's life sometimes. I am the Master of the Flying Guillotine! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Astrotoy7 Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 @Astro--my master has won nat'l championships. I bet he pwns your master. my master has won internat'l championships. I bet he pwms your master, and his master too. mtfbwya Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Det. Bart Lasiter Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 I'd like to try Kendo myself, but there's no dojo within a reasonable driving distance. The art I'd really like to try is Battoujutsu. My friend recently earned his black belt in it, and his father has been practicing it for a long time, I'm amazed at the speed they can sheath their katanas. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Nine Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 I think everyone's misinterpreted my posts (and the name given to this thread). My point isn't that youth always wins over experience - just that I would win against Jae. Keep dreaming, ED. Your strategy's got so many holes in it, it's not even funny. Yeah, you've got youth, but she's got experience, practice, patience and an actual workable strategy. Which is why my money is still on Jae. You're lucky you two are so friendly with each other, because if you weren't, I'd imagine she'd thrash the bejeezus out of you. Sorry, but in this case, the old adage applies rather well: "Youth is wasted on the young." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Det. Bart Lasiter Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 NINER USE YOU AZN KUNG-FU TO BEAT SOME SENSE INTO HIM. POWER UP PAST 9000 IF YOU HAVE TO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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