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A Real American Hero? *spoilerz* if you care...


Darth Groovy

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I hate to judge a movie by it's images but jeezum crow, this is cobra commander?!

 

 

 

 

The more I hear and see about this movie, the more it makes my skin crawl. It looks even worse than Daredevil...

 

Check out these images:

 

 

I HATE sounding like the stereotypical fan boy, but I feel the powerful need to destroy this film and all remnants of it's creation before it hits theaters this summer.

 

So far this movie makes Van Helsing look like Ben - Hur! :(

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What is so hard about replicating this costume?

 

http://popprolific.files.wordpress.com/2007/09/cobra_commander-live-action.jpg

 

Why?

 

G.I. Joe always had potential of being a great movie, it's just that Stephen Sommers has not had a successful movie since The Mummy.

 

If you can get your hands on any of the old Marvel Comics from the 80's check it out. The characters were intense, mature, and deeply fleshed out. Also interesting was the blood relation between Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow.

 

I smell another Punisher:War Zone here.

 

Hollywood needs to stop crapping all over my child hood.

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Hah. I laugh at your petty American heroes gone awry. I'm still going see this thing downloaded from the internet in the theaters just because it has Darth Maul in it. :p

 

You probably deserve having your over-patriotic childhoods broken to pieces and fed through a wood chipper before being burned in the eternal fires of Hell. If not for anything else but because you've let Hollywood get away with crappy comic book movie adaptations for too long.

 

Hah!

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Meh, my country's army ended a war with 2 bombs. What did Finland do...besides wasting money chroming their out-dated weaponry?

 

Besides - eventually Hollywood'll get one of 'em right. Just...just don't hold your breath.

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Fin1.jpg

 

plus Finland is the land of kickass metal :)

 

That is the only place where Death Metal is socially acceptable......totally awesome!!!!:D

 

 

 

Meh, my country's army ended a war with 2 bombs. What did Finland do...besides wasting money chroming their out-dated weaponry?

 

Besides - eventually Hollywood'll get one of 'em right. Just...just don't hold your breath.

 

Well...the Finns stopped the Soviets dead in the snow during the Russian attempt to relieve Leningrad....not a very small feat, as the Soviets threw nearly everything at them....:D

 

Yes....Hollywood should dispose of the bad directors via Siberia....:D

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Well...the Finns stopped the Soviets dead in the snow during the Russian attempt to relieve Leningrad....not a very small feat, as the Soviets threw nearly everything at them....:D

 

Didn't the Russians do that to the French when Napoleon tried taking Moscow? When your best national defense is the severity of your winter, the only thing stopping the enemy from crushing you is their stupidity.

 

Damn it, this isn't the place to debate war tactics of various nations. Can't we all just hate this horrible movie? Personally, I can't trust an action movie starring one of the Wayans any further than I could throw said Wayan.

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Can't we all just hate this horrible movie? Personally, I can't trust an action movie starring one of the Wayans any further than I could throw said Wayan.

 

QFE

 

It wouldn't be hard to make a live action GI Joe Movie---In the 80's where sweaty dudes and cheesy one liners were the norm.

 

The plot could have gone something like this. Cobra is actually a Private Military Company running **** up in the middle east. They get REALLY good at what they do. They Hire Destro to build them a weapon of mass destruction. Weapon is tested on soil close to home, and world get's terrified. General Hawk then recruits army dudes from around the world to build a counter PMC. Project G.I. Joe.

 

What's so damn hard about that?!! You don't need all this pseudo sci fi faggotry to sell this movie. Also if they read any of the 80's comics many of these characters had some pretty interesting back stories.

 

Instead we get a really bad trailer with my new favorite line ever:

 

"The Deep Six Accelerator Suit. What does it accelerate? You!"

 

I swear the first person that yells "yo Joe" in this movie, I will start coughing up blood. :S

 

One more thing. The whole "black costume" thing played itself out in 2003...:rolleyes: These people are soldiers, not mutant super heroes.

 

http://www.thejay.com/2008/04/21/gijoe-movie-costumes-batsuit/

 

I suppose when they show this one, they will be playing George Thorogood's "Bad To The Bone" in the back round. :rolleyes:

 

g_i_joe_picture.jpg

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I don't know of anybody that shoots action like Michael Bay. Nobody shoots women like Michael Bay. He is shameless about it. And the world wants that. Middle America wants the shameless, exploitive, escapism film. That's what they want. They want big, bad, sexy and fast.

This statement pretty much sums up everything wrong with Hollywood.

 

And it's also pretty relevant to this movie.

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One more thing. The whole "black costume" thing played itself out in 2003...:rolleyes: These people are soldiers, not mutant super heroes

 

Well, Snake-Eyes has an excuse to be wearing a black suit. And yes, I know his original suit was blue, but still - he is a ninja.

 

Speaking of Snake-Eyes, why do I have this horrible sickening feeling that he's going to talk in this movie...talk ALOT.

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This statement pretty much sums up everything wrong with Hollywood.

 

And it's also pretty relevant to this movie.

 

When I read this quote, it reminds me of what happened to Watchmen, and by what happened, I mean coping out on character background stories for bloody fights and overdrawn sex scenes.

 

Movies from the now arn't as good as movies from back in the day...

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