leXX Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 An iceberg didn't sink the Titanic, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Jedi Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 Alright, the Chuck Norris thread is not a new idea, but that doesn't mean that it's a bad one. So instead of this turning into a gigantic copy/paste thread, let's go by a guideline or two. 1) Only one or two Chuck Norris "facts" per post. No copy and pasting a huge list that you've had for oh so long. 2) And in answer to the next question: No you may not type your huge list, just to get around the copy/paste rule. Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BongoBob Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 Come on people, Chuck Norris jokes are so last year Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades, a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly 'get out of jail free' card. Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IG-64 Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 I'm just gonna say this: Ron Paul may have all of the internets, but Mike Huckabee has Chuck Norris, so that's why he's winning. Oh, and my favorite: Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acrylic Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 My favorite one is: Chuck Norris is Kjølen's dad. Oh wait... o_o Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TiE23 Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 In the beginning God said, "Let there be light." Chuck Norris then said, "Say please." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyrion Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 In the beginning God said, "Let there be light." Chuck Norris then said, "Say please." You loser, I was going to say that. Chuck Norris does not read. He stares a book down until it gives him the information he wants. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leXX Posted December 21, 2007 Author Share Posted December 21, 2007 Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoxStar Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 When Chuck Norris goes swimming, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrWally Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 Last year scientists discovered that Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Unfortunately, Chuck Norris never cries. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Det. Bart Lasiter Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 SPOILERS: CHUCK NORRIS DIES BRUCE LEE FO' LYFE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chase Windu Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 -Chuck Norris doesn't check his closet for the Boogie Man. The Boogie Man checks his closet for Chuck Norris. -A gun sleeps with Chuck Norris under it's pillow. -Macgyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can kill him and take it. -Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and made Amelia Earhart disappear while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean. -Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent. -Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hallucination Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 Secretly, all women dream they're sleeping with Chuck Norris when they have sex. Their partners know it, but they don't mind 'cause they're doing the same thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chase Windu Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 Chuck Norris eats transformer toys in vehicle mode and poos them out transformed into a robot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Samnmax221 Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 I never liked Chuck Norris jokes when they were just another simple stupid internet phenomenon. Unfortunately it had to trickle down until ever douche bag and his step-mom were spouting them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrWally Posted December 23, 2007 Share Posted December 23, 2007 Chuck Norris sues over "The Truth About Chuck Norris: 400 facts about the World's Greatest Human" Gotta say, I can definitely understand why he did it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lightsaberboy Posted December 23, 2007 Share Posted December 23, 2007 he didn't seem to mind when he was on here: http://youtube.com/watch?v=7l5lyB28z4o Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leXX Posted December 23, 2007 Author Share Posted December 23, 2007 Chuck Norris really is invincible! So funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorden Darkblade Posted December 24, 2007 Share Posted December 24, 2007 I'm just gonna say this: Ron Paul may have all of the internets, but Mike Huckabee has Chuck Norris, so that's why he's winning. Oh, and my favorite: Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. When Chuck Norris goes swimming, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris. These are my favorite ones!!! The first time I saw the Chuck Norris phrases I remember I couldn't catch my breath cuz I was laughing so hard!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chase Windu Posted December 24, 2007 Share Posted December 24, 2007 SPOILERS: CHUCK NORRIS DIES BRUCE LEE FO' LYFE Maybe he pretends to be dead but waits to make his move when Bruce Lee has his back turned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IG-64 Posted December 24, 2007 Share Posted December 24, 2007 Well, see, Chuck Norris was dead in the movie. In real life, Chuck Norris is not really dead, and Bruce Lee is -- well... you know. In fact, in real life, Chuck Norris is actually immortal. Throughout the eons he has traveled the universe. A little known fact about Chuck Norris is that he was actually Luke Skywalker. No really, it's true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vikinor Posted January 20, 2008 Share Posted January 20, 2008 This brings back bad Barrens memories. Also, leXX, have you heard the song about the cake being a lie? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue15 Posted January 20, 2008 Share Posted January 20, 2008 Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding. When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jon_hill987 Posted January 20, 2008 Share Posted January 20, 2008 Chuck Norris was originally considered for the lead role in 24. But after killing all of the terrorists in 12 minutes and 43 seconds the producers decided to go for someone else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinny Posted January 20, 2008 Share Posted January 20, 2008 Dude IG, that pic is hilarious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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