Jump to content

Home

Ashton Kutcher Is Batman...


Boba Rhett

Recommended Posts

What the...

 

 

E! Online reports that Ashton Kutcher is the sole candidate for the role of Batman:

 

That's right, Ashton Kutcher.

 

Yes, in a world gone mad, Kutcher moves from Dude, Where's My Car? to playing the Dark Knight. But as he is basically attaching himself to every project in Hollywood right now, when approached about Batman, he quietly attached himself to that, too. Yes, this might change, but at present, he's the man in the cowl.

 

As a responsible journalistic outlet, we have to ask: How the hell did this happen?! Well, when now out director Brett Ratner got close to casting Superman this year, he tested and retested Kutcher, who apparently did well. The "known mostly as a comic actor and that's even a stretch" Kutcher seemed to want Bats over Supes (who wouldn't?) and is now close to being announced as the lead in the flick to be directed by Christopher Nolan.

 

____________________________________________

 

 

*Gets very dizzy*

 

How.... what... I....

 

....brain..... imploding....

 

*sssluuurp*

 

 

*falls down*

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I refuse to accept it.. Some nobody will come along and oust Kutcher from the spot...

 

*Andy867 walks up to Brett Ratner,

Can I apply for Batman?

Brett Ratner: Apply? Hell, you have the job... *points to Ashton* Kutcher, you're out... David ******** You're in!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Gah....

 

 

Why him of all people? Nothing like kicking a dead franchise when it is already down. I gave up on Batman, when they let George Clooney done that costume. Not that George is such a bad actor, but he did not fit the Batman role at all, and even he knows it.

 

Gah........ what a dissapointment......:(

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The only good Batman movie was the first anyway. Batman Returns was allright, but it wasn't as good as the first. So now Ashton Kutcher will be batman?

 

I just hope to God that the next Batman is going to be a comedy, or a spoof.

 

"Robin, what does my tattoo say?"

 

"sweet! What does mine say?"

 

"DUDE!"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree with Obi-Wan.

I didn't even bother going to see the fourth one after the disappointment that was Batman Forever (with the possible exception of Jim Carrey, but even so...)

 

I certainly wouldn't bother to go see a fifth. Why would anyone? I thought the comic-book-into-a-movie-bandwagon was dying with the Hulk (which I have to say, from the trailers, looks ropey at best). Why bother resurretcing Batman? :rolleyes:

 

As for who plays Batman, does it matter? Really?

 

B.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This is the Batman that Christopher Nolan is directing? I still think this could be pretty good. Kutcher is mostly seen as a comedic actor, but the same was true of Michael Keaton before he was cast as Batman. I like Ashton Kutcher, if nothing else, he's got the build for the part.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Apart from "dewd, where'z mah car?", has our dear Ashton been in any other movies of recognition?

 

 

 

 

 

 

'Coz I'm not renting that steaming pile of **** just to check him out.

 

 

And by checking him out, I mean that in the most manly, viking way.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by BLaCKouT_1138

Erm...

Isn't that the way you mean you don't mean? ;)

Not that there's anything wrong with it if that's what you're into.

 

You implying something, aye? ;)

 

 

Chieftain: And when we come to the Franks, we will slay the women and ravish the men!

 

*embarrased silence*

 

Viking 1: Wait, do you really mean we should ravish...

 

Chieftain: No, of course not! Slip of the tongue! We will slay the men and ravish the women!

 

Viking 2, femme voice, highly annoyed: Look, I can't see why those of us who want to slay the women and ravish the men shouldn't be allowed to!

 

Chieftain: OK, OK, nevermind!

 

:D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Any comic book character is easy money, even if it is a flop in the box office. Merchandising is a big money spinner these days, and I would assume Batman would make plenty in that perspective.

 

As for Ashton being the Bat, wouldn't he say something stupid like "So, Alfred, am I Bruce or am I Batman?"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by STTCT

Ashton seems like he'd make a better Robin...than a batman

 

 

Ya, I agree, Ashton Kutcher doesnt have black hair, he doesnt have the batman attitude, and he is way too, ummn crazy, to be the serious batman. I think he would be great at the robin position:)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...